# Cant bring myself to do 'the dirty deed'



## Pollydoodle (Aug 18, 2005)

I know this is a motorhome forum but I also know that a lot of folks are doggy people, so you will sympathise with my predicament. Just need to get this off my chest so to speak

I have a much loved ancient G shepherd x collie (16 1/4) who I have had since he was 5 months old. for some months now he has lost the plot. -Next bit not for the squeamish - Poos in the wrong places - comes in from the garden to do it!  and generally performs when and where he feels the urge. It has been/is manageable although not very pleasant, especially in front of visitors!  he still wants his walks, albeit short and gentle, and he will halfheartedly chase a ball thrown for his much younger companion and still gets excited about his food. Yesterday he fell up the doorstep 4 times, twice we had to pick him up. last night I got up to take some asprins and found him in the corner lying in a heap of yuccky unable to get up. (vinyl flooring) after I cleaned up he went to his water bowl drank and then sank to the ground where he stood. I got him up again and after pacing round and round the table (quite usual for him) he eventually he settled back on his bed. I spent a sleepless night thinking this is IT. In the morning he raised himself to join his companion on her walk, had his breakfast and we were back to square one. I came home from work today thinking 'I'll do IT tomorrow, but looking at him, I just cant do it. I dont think he is in any pain (we have seen the vet) but whilst he is looking for his walk, enjoying his food............. If only last night had been during the day there would have been no doubts.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.


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## spooky (May 1, 2005)

Hi
You have our sympathy with your dilemma, we have been in a similar position, all we can say is first look at the quality of life that your dog is getting and what would you want if you were in that position, second how will you feel if it get worse and injures themselves or others and you will feel even worse. It is one of the most difficult things playing god with an animal but strangely we are fighting for the choice to do it with humans.
What ever your decision stick by it and always remember that you made the call at the time you thought best and never regret it as it was your best choice.
we wish you well

malc liz and of course Spooky


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## 100560 (Aug 16, 2006)

This is the dog owner's worst time. We have three dogs, all fairly young, but we have been in your position before. Our labrador was just the same as your dog, she had bad arthritis in her back legs and couldn't squat. In the end she became incontinent and distressed. Is he on medication? Steroids perhaps? I think you will know what to do instinctively, if he can't be helped any more. It's the last kindness you can do for your pet when the time comes.


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## mangothemadmonk (Aug 6, 2006)

Sounds like he has started with dementia.

It will probably just get gradually worse. Have another chat with your vet and see what they think. It may be better to put the old lad to sleep for the sake of your own health. Sorry but thats my thoughts.

Johnny F


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## vmeldrew (May 3, 2007)

We put the deed off too long and looking at photographs now realise our last dog looked really ill but because we saw her every day we didn't notice the deterioration. We got the vet to come to the house to save her the distress of going to the surgery, and we were all gathered around her comforting her at the end.

It is a very difficult decision, but bear in mind whatever you decide it will be the best for your dog and try not to let your impending feelings of loss get in the way of what is best for your pet.


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## LPDrifter (Aug 17, 2005)

That's a tough call you have to make there...   
Just follow your heart. You will know when the time is right to take him down to the vet.

Take care


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## takeaflight (May 9, 2005)

I am so sorry about your dog, however the other side of the coin is that you gave him a wonderful life for 16years.

Not all dogs are so lucky.

Best wishes


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## TinaGlenn (Jul 7, 2006)

We had a Labrador x Snoopy who got to about the same age and started to loose control of his bladder and bowel. We knew he couldn't help it and never told him off or got cross, but he knew it wasn't right and got very upset and started to get very withdrawn, he started to collapse on his back legs now and then, and one day he just looked up at us and we all knew. He wasn't in any pain but for a once proud and energetic dog he was still suffering. Our vet was fantastic and Snoopy slipped away peacefuly and painlessly. Glenn and I cried ourselves silly but knew that we had done the right thing, but it hurt a lot to do.

You will know when he has had enough

Blessings to you all

Tina & Glenn


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## DABurleigh (May 9, 2005)

I'd wait a day or two to see if there is any deterioration in the short term, then whether there is or not take him to the vet JUST for advice on what they feel is best for the dog. You might ask about the prognosis, and whether there is discomfort or pain (any increase in panting?)

Then it is your decision. It is our last duty not to let our pets suffer with no hope of recovery.

Whatever you decide, it won't be easy, but I hope you will be comforted in the knowledge you have made the the right decision with the dog's interests at heart.

Dave


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## andyman (Aug 31, 2006)

Been there twice, I think somehow you know just know when it is time. The last time we walked out of the vets in tears, my 4 year old son says, thats it then. I look back now and smile at the inocence in that coment.


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## Walmer (Mar 4, 2006)

We went through the same thing with our last 2 dogs. Some people may laugh at this - but I think it is important to let your pet know that it's OK to go.

As Tina and Glenn say - you will know when the time really has come. If it had been last night, it would have been the right time, but this morning he was game for a walk and his breakast. Our 18 year old collie convinced me the time had come 3 times and changed his mind the next day!

Whe our lab started falling up stairs etc, we put a harness on her so we could steady her.

Hilary


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## loddy (Feb 12, 2007)

It's not an easy decision to make, lots of us have been there and know how painful it is.

My thoughts are with you
Loddy


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## Nora+Neil (May 1, 2005)

Know how you feel. Had to do it with our last 3 dogs. 
Its hard but we felt it was right thing to do.

It will be the best thing in the end. Make sure you have plenty of photos. 
Also sit and talk to him.

Thinking of you.
Good luck.


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## JockandRita (Jun 1, 2005)

Hi Pollydoodle,

Having been there a few weeks ago, I can honestly say that it is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do.

I knew that it was best for "Bobbie", but that did nothing to relieve all these feelings of guilt, that I now had. However, his suffering was not an option, and the decision had to be made.

A few weeks later, those feelings of extreme guilt have subsided, as Rita and I come to terms with "Bobbie's" demise.
It's hard, but it slowly get's easier.
I do sympathise, and wish you some comfort, when you do finally make that decision.

Jock.


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## Nickynoo (May 18, 2007)

I hope you have been able to make a decision . Your dog has had a wonderful life . As a previous post said think what you would want in that position and follow your heart.
I personally feel that with some animals losing their dignity is the biggest blow, others cling on to life. Just like us they are all different you know your dog and you will know whats right but it is never easy .I don't envy your position and my heart goes out to you . Be strong 
Nick


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## Rapide561 (Oct 1, 2005)

*Dogs*

Hi

A terrible decision to make, but one that can actually mean a dogs life ends on a happy note. By that, I mean, a doggy can be put to sleep with grace and dignity, rather than having to battle on. It makes the decision no easier, I know.

If you have to put your doggy to sleep, and send him to the rainbow bridge, think of all the good times you have had together, not the bad ones.

I am heartbroken for you, I really am. It is four months since I lost Oscar and I know the distress losing a pet causes.

Be strong for your baby and do what is best for him. Keeping him going may be easier for you, but not him. I hope that does not sound harsh, I do not intend it to, and I am so sad writing this. Talk to your vet beforehand and if you do decide to send him on holiday to the rainbow bridge, have a last few minutes in the sunshine with him.

The vet will ask whether you want to stay with him or let them do the necessary. Everyone is different but I feel that if possible the owner should stay. It is harrowing, heartbreaking and terrible, but your baby will be with you to the end. He will not feel anything and he will not be afraid as you will be there. He simply goes to sleep. His eyes may however remain open, but the vet can close them. You will also have the option of having the ashes returned. I am sorry to sound so practical, and I know it is not so easy in practice.

Looking to the future, there are many dogs needing a new family - one was recently rehomed to a MHFer.

When I lost Oscar I said "no way" to a dog, then I said "yes" - the immediate period after losing a dog is not the clearest time to think. I am however on the lookout for another Weimaraner who is in rescue and will give him the new life he deserves. I know Oscar would not mind this, just as your baby would not mind.

Take care xxx


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## ksebruce (Nov 5, 2006)

Hi, we really feel for you. We had this decision to make with our Rottie Bruce. He developed "wobblers syndrome" apparently it's quite common in horses as well, the nerves in the neck betwwen the shoulder blades become trapped due to crumbling bones. This caused him to suddenly collapse in a heap without warning and other things like falling over when he cocked his leg. He was on medication for some time eventually this was so strong that he was asleep most of the time and always appeared to be doped. So we took the decision that enough was enough and we were keeping him going for us not for him. It was awful, we felt guilty for ages which makes the sorrow even worse. Now 3 years down the line we are sure we did the right thing. I think you have to look at it from the "what is best for the dog" point of view.

We wish you well it's the hardest decision you'll ever have to make as I'm sure anyone who loves their dog will tell you.


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## annetony (May 1, 2005)

I really sympathise with you, our Rusty is getting old, we have had him about 15 years, he only has 3 legs, is going deaf and blind and sometimes twitches, it reminds me of someone with Parkinsons, we know that the time will come when we have to make the same decision as you, and we dread that time. Be strong and do what you think is best, dont feel guilty, you are doing what is best for your dog as we will when Rustys time comes. You have fantastic memories and they will help you to get through it, Take care 

Anne


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## damondunc (Feb 14, 2006)

My heart goes out to you ,i think you know what you need to do and i have found in the past that once you have made the decision it is best to see it through.
From what you say about toileting where he wants,i think you may find he has disintergration of the nerves in the spinal column,therefore he cannot feel when he needs to go to the loo and from what i can remember it is not treatable ( my old lab had it ).
They are discussing this topic today on Animal Rescue 10am BBC1

Chris


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## Suenliam (Mar 22, 2006)

There is nothing we can say to lessen the burden for you. Others are right. You will know when the time has finally come. It is not appropriate for you to feel guilty if you are acting in the dogs best interest but love for a pet is so hard. I am sitting here typing this with tears streaming - I have had to take such hard decisions in the past for both dogs and cats, whom I still love equally. 

Then I think of Rainbow Bridge and it's so lovely but makes the tears flow faster. So happy for our pets, so sad for us that remain.

For all it's hard to take at a time like this - we would not miss one minute of our pets company during all their time with us however hard the final decision is to take. 

Probably not the best time to mention it, but I have had our last 3 pets ashes returned and I still get comfort from this. I was surprised how understanding our vet was when I first mentioned it and he made all the arrangements. 

What ever and when ever you make the decision - be strong and know it is right by you pet.

Sue


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## 91502 (May 1, 2005)

Hi
May I also say how sorry I am.
The final decision is not really a hard one, you will know when the time is right and afterwards there will be a feeling of relief.
I would always recommend getting the vet to come to your house it is much better than the trip to the vets and having to face up to the other people in the waiting room.
It doesn’t cost too much, I think my vets charge about £30 and it’s well worth it for you and your best friend. 
Talk to the vet soon and let them know what your plans are as it makes it easier when the day comes.
Best of luck.
James


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## Pollydoodle (Aug 18, 2005)

Thank you to everyone for all your kind words. It means a lot to me to know you are all thinking of us. I have been there before, twice, but it really doesnt make it any easier. I spoke to the vet a few weeks ago and we did try some pills but he didnt think it would make any difference (it didn't) I will have the vet to my house when the time comes as I did with my other 2 dogs - much kinder if you are able to do it. We will be away at the weekend and I think I will probably decide then. Give him one last outing. He has been watching me pack the van so he is able to recognise that through his dementia. I will let you all know when it is 'done'. Poor Polo (5) will miss him dreadfully. When she came to us as a pup she demanded comfort from him whether he liked it or not and she is unhappy if we walk her without him. 

Thank you everyone

Sheila


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

Don't be afraid to discuss it with your vet. Let him/her know you are thinking of euthanasia. They then feel comfortable to talk about all the options. Most vets will not suggest it because owners get so upset and call the vet a murderer. Once they understand your problem they will give you all the support you need.

I agree with all the other sentiments and as I once said to little boy who was absolutely distraught at having his guinea pig put to sleep "if Squeaky could thank you he would". His mother later told me that he was most comforted by that thought.

Best wishes at this most difficult time.

Pat


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## maddie (Jan 4, 2006)

Hi Sheila,I am sat reading this with tears in my eyes (3 times)be thankfull for the enjoyable years you have had together.Take him and let the vet recomend what he thinks best.I cannot say any more  
terry


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