# Another one liner.



## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

How do you kill a Circus?



Go for the juggler.


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## tonyt (May 25, 2005)

You were right - it's much, much worse


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

That's not the really rubbish one Tony, it's much longer, Alan.


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

*Three bits of string, joke.*

Three bit of string go into a pub.

One says, "you two grab a table and I will get the drinks". He goes to the bar and asks for three pints. The barman says, "sorry we don't serve bit of string in here." He goes back and tells his mates.

The second one says, "You are joking, I will speak to him." He goes and asks for three pints and the barman says, "I told your mate, we don't serve bits of string in here." He goes back and tells his mates.

The third one says, "you two are useless, watch this." He ruffles one up and ties himself in a knot then goes to the bar and asks for three pints. The barman says, "are you a piece of string?" and number three says, "no, I'm a frayed knot".


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## 747 (Oct 2, 2009)

Have you found an old joke book in a charity shop?

I suppose your next effort will be:

The East German pole vault champion is now the West german pole vault champion. 8O


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

No these are just some old favourites. I dare not tell my best jokes on here, Alan.


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## lifestyle (Apr 27, 2008)

I still enjoy sex at 74.........i live at number 75    

Les


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

This one is risky. If easily offended don't read on.









Man to wife, "Do you fancy a 68 and a half". 

"What's that". 

"You suck mine now and I'll owe you one."


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## lifestyle (Apr 27, 2008)

My parents are from glasgow,which means they are incredibly hard.
But i was never smacked as a child.............well maybe one or two grams to get me to sleep at night.




Les


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

My parents were rough and ready. My father was rough and my mother was ready.


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## lifestyle (Apr 27, 2008)

I sent twenty different puns to all my friends with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh.


No pun in ten did.


Les


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## philsil (Jul 24, 2007)

Husband looking out on the street says,

"You know love there's a rumour that the window cleaner over there has had sex with every woman in this street except one."

"Yes," says his wife, " I bet it's that stuck up cow in number 42"


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## 747 (Oct 2, 2009)

Bob and Fred had always worked together down the pit and were the best of friends. They always drank together on Friday nights. On the way home from work on Friday afternoon, Bob said "I will be round at 7 pm as usual, make sure you are ready".

"OK mate, see you then", said Fred.

Bob called at Freds house at seven and knocked on the door.

Freds very distraught wife answered the door.

"Eeh whats the matter pet?", said Bob.

"Its Fred, he's dead", she sobbed.

"Dead", said Bob, "what happened"?

"I asked him to go up the garden and cut a cabbage, halfway up, he just collapsed and died".

"Eeh thats terrible", said Bob, "what did you do then"?

"Well", she said, "I just opened a tin of peas instead".


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