# Well a day alone



## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Tomorrow it’s just me him and shadow

No Winston charging around, full of the joys of spring 

no grandkids whether working to earn money, or just here because it’s school holidays 

Full of the joys of spring or whatever 

We are definately getting old

“And how the silence surged softly backwards

When the plunging hoofs are gone “

Apology's to Walter de la Mare 

Boy do we need that silence to surge softly backwards 

I’m nackered 

Sandra


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## nickoff (Oct 11, 2005)

I bet by lunchtime you will be looking at each other saying " are you going to ring them or should I"? Just joking girl, enjoy the p&q.

Nick.


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

And breathe!


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

Lock up and pretend to be out.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

It’s not really the kids or dogs

I am finding it takes “all the running I can do to stay in the same place “ 

I potter all day to sort out the house ,the washing , cooking etc 

And think longingly of the days when I could clean from top to bottom including all the windows in a day 

Have washed and ironed the lounge curtains , I was drawing up the gathers and tying off the strings, and I thought who’s hands are these fumbling to tie a Knot ?

We age slowly , but it’s the little details that jolt us into realising 


We’re getting old , the needle we can’t thread, the stitches that are so difficult 

But I guess we will get used to it 

If we get time :grin2:>

Sandra


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

It certainly doesn't get easier. Yesterday I gave my shower a huge clean. I bought a new plastic strip for the bottom of the frameless glass door (so water doesn't run all over the floor). When you get down on your hands and knees you see the glass and the lower level tiles have calcaire (what is the English word?) and soap residues, which you can't see when you get into the shower with glasses off. I had to use the glass top stove scraper to get it off and then re-surface it with the glass top ceramic polish. Then mildew chemical spray to get rid of the black marks in the grooves. Looks almost new now. After wingeing for more about an hour I managed to persuade my OH that 'Shower Shine' is not the same product as Windowlene, and although the product is a bit pricey it's worth it to preserve the coating on the shower glass, avoid the muck sticking and the stuck record moaning! Result on all counts!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

I’m ignoring the shower Viv 

It’s down for demolition , I want, no need , a walk in shower of generous proportions 

I should remove the jaccusi bath But I’d need to replace it with another one, and it works fine

But it’s champagneand my son tells me you need to redo the whole bathroom with white fittings 

Bath, bidet , toilet, sink etc ,

Now the bidet is the hounds water bowl at night 

And I like champagne

And if the one who buys my house doesn’t like it

Be my guest 
No doubt you’ll change it all over time

Just as I did when I bought it

And I’m not going to second guess your preferences 

But I will leave you a house with strong family love and good feelings 

Because I believe it seeps into the bricks and mortar 

When I first bought this house , I struggled , it wasn’t a home

The people who had owned it 

Owned a Chinese restaurant , never cooked in it 

Our main lounge was a billiard room, lit by money put into a pay slot 

No doubt lovely people 

But it took me ages for those bricks and mortar to decide it was a home 

For me to feel accepted 

Sandra


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## JanHank (Mar 29, 2015)

When we were selling our place in the UK the estate agent said don't bother altering anything, whoever buys it will have their own ideas, it's the location that sells a place.
The person who bought it also bought the paddock behind us at the same time so our location definitely sold the place. We went back a few years later, she had altered the whole inside of the bungalow even knocked down walls etc.


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

Yes, we were told not to alter. De clutter, yes, but most people buy the location, followed by the size and shape of a house. De cluttering means that they can see the actual shape of the building. I fell in love with mine when it was in a dire state. We had done up two previous neglected houses and swore we would not take on another. We stayed for coffee, when we viewed this house, purely to be polite. NO WAY were we going to take on another major project set in four acres of weeds and brambles. Still here 35 years later  Just done another complete renovation (courtesy of builders this time round) to turn it around, so that we can see the view at the back of the house from our armchairs rather than the kitchen sink Moved back in yesterday and loving it!


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

When we put ours up for sale the agents said to take out the champagne suite and put in white, first three lots of viewers said they like the champagne suite in the upstairs bathroom, I said we had one down here, but was told it would sell better with white for the ensuite, you can't win, just wasted lots of time and money farting about for an estate agent who appear to have no clue of the market


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Everyone that visits loves our house. But loving it and buying are two different things.
We never realised just what a great house it was until we lived in it full time. It was initially a holiday home and as such you have different priorities.
It's always so warm and easy to heat which is so important here in Normandy in winter. OK we go away for the sun.:laugh:

But we have no idea where else we would like to be if we did relocate. And would the next place be so cosy, spacious and quiet. So we defer till later.

Ray.


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## ChrisandJohn (Feb 3, 2008)

raynipper said:


> Everyone that visits loves our house. But loving it and buying are two different things.
> We never realised just what a great house it was until we lived in it full time. It was initially a holiday home and as such you have different priorities.
> It's always so warm and easy to heat which is so important here in Normandy in winter. OK we go away for the sun.:laugh:
> 
> ...


Ray, if you love your house, it works for you, and it's in the place you want to be, why bother to move?

There was lots I really loved about our last house but I was feeling increasingly out on a limb in it's location as it's a long journey to get to anywhere I wanted to be. Like you, I'm not a gardener but gardening is essential to John. I thought, in the long term, a smaller flatter garden would be better as long as we moved soon so he can make a new one while he's fit enough. John agreed to move if we downsized but as we get visitors quite often we needed at least three good sized bedrooms and then don't seem to exist. So we have a slightly smaller four bedroom house. The new garden is currently being 'made' as we back onto a sloping field, which our garden was once part of about 40 years ago and the soil had never been improved. Land drains are now being put in, compost is being made, and maybe next year it will begin to look like a garden instead of a mud bath.

I would say to anyone though, if you think you'll need to move in the future don't leave it until you really have to. It must be four years ago we started the process by getting in estate agents, and of course as well as finding buyers and co-ordinating that with finding somewhere to move to, the decluttering, planning, moving and settling in take their physical and emotional toll.

Agreed about location being the main seller. Our eventual buyers who were moving back North had a narrow boat and we had a canal frontage.

Chris


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## Bornfree (Sep 25, 2017)

how strange, I spent a good hour doing exactly the same thing yesterday. Bottom of the door, oven scraper for all that gunk you can only see on your knees, ceramic polish. I can't see the benefit when standing upright, but I know it's clean.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

I suppose Chris

What two can do , one can’t

Alberts been for a walk with shadow in the cemetery, trees have been cut , so he’s gone back with the car to collect the ones that will fit into the car and he will chain saw them into logs suitable for the fire 

He will trim and replant and feed the garden pots and hanging baskets , young Albert will lift them out of the greenhouse as though they are a vase of flowers

He will trim the hedges , and all the Ivy’s that grow up our walls , being careful to miss the breeding season of the sparrows 

Monitor the pond and the fish , some of whom are 20 years old 

Clean the filters, replace the ultra violet sterilisers 

None of that will I do

But I love the seclusion if the hedges, we live on a main road, the green and gold of the Ivy’s, the chatter of the sparrows, the colours of the fish, the burping of the frogs 

Me I mostly do inside, the meals, the washing , the cleaning , he does most of the shopping now , but once a week we clean together, which gives me a chance to do the windows etc 

So where there is two, it remains possible 

Sandra


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Bornfree said:


> how strange, I spent a good hour doing exactly the same thing yesterday. Bottom of the door, oven scraper for all that gunk you can only see on your knees, ceramic polish. I can't see the benefit when standing upright, but I know it's clean.


It's so true

I see nothing without my glasses, and then I'd need to kneel down, which is not going to happen any more

And some of the time that's an advantage

I try to make sure my house is spotless

But then again there is spotless and spotless

And shadow and Winston make sure that can never happen

But it's a home , not a house

And friends and family are not looking at the skirting boards

After all they are not eating on the floor

Sandra


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

ChrisandJohn said:


> Ray, if you love your house, it works for you, and it's in the place you want to be, why bother to move?
> 
> There was lots I really loved about our last house but I was feeling increasingly out on a limb in it's location as it's a long journey to get to anywhere I wanted to be. Like you, I'm not a gardener but gardening is essential to John. I thought, in the long term, a smaller flatter garden would be better as long as we moved soon so he can make a new one while he's fit enough. John agreed to move if we downsized but as we get visitors quite often we needed at least three good sized bedrooms and then don't seem to exist. So we have a slightly smaller four bedroom house. The new garden is currently being 'made' as we back onto a sloping field, which our garden was once part of about 40 years ago and the soil had never been improved. Land drains are now being put in, compost is being made, and maybe next year it will begin to look like a garden instead of a mud bath.
> 
> ...


 I so agree with this. We nearly sold our house, to full time while we hunted for a decent bungalow, twice. It wasn't to be so we are staying put. We love this house, especially the location, so decided to renovate so that it met our requirements for our old age. We now have a downstairs bedroom with ensuite. We don't have buses in our village and that is the major disadvantage. We have just decided that we will have to put aside some money for taxis to the nearest town/bus stop. Sorted.


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## ChrisandJohn (Feb 3, 2008)

aldra said:


> I suppose Chris
> 
> What two can do , one can't
> 
> ...


We didn't move to avoid chopping and carrying wood but we did agree that if the house we moved to didn't have a wood burner we wouldn't put one in. That's because we intended that the 'new' house would be where we would stay until such time as someone else would either be carrying us out or arranging for us to be in some sort of specialist accommodation. So everything we're doing with this new house is to make it more simple and accessible. Having said that John has already planted numerous fruit trees, raspberries, gooseberries etc. which should keep him happy and busy with future pruning.

Chris


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

I also agree the house we move to

Won’t have gardens, woodburners , dogs or stairs

It will be self cleaning and close to a takeaway for meals 

Meanwhile I’ll cook and clean 

Wander the garden, watch the fish , the birds and the frogs

Delight as the trees come into leaf, the hostas as they unfurl 

And the hound from hell

Although he will be the last in a long line of German Shepherds, we are too old now to provide what they need 

And he will just have to put up with us , short walks as the knees are not so good 

But I recon given the choice he would stay where he’s loved by us and his extended family 

And I recon I’ll stay put as well as long as I can

Sandra


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

It is also about community isn't it? When we full timed, for a few years, it was the one thing I truly missed. Being around people who have known you for a while, know all your little foibles, is a very comforting thing. To have to build up that sense of trust elsewhere is quite daunting.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

But it's all down to the sort of person you are Pat. An introvert won't make friends easily but an extrovert will.
When I'm accused of being too blatant at times and might offend someone with my straightforward comments, I feel I have enough friends to be able to loose a few overly sensitive ones.

Ray.


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

patp said:


> It is also about community isn't it? When we full timed, for a few years, it was the one thing I truly missed. Being around people who have known you for a while, know all your little foibles, is a very comforting thing. To have to build up that sense of trust elsewhere is quite daunting.


I know exactly what you mean Pat. After 2 or 3 months in the moho and meeting so many wonderful interesting people, I'm tired of repeating 'my intro'.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Yep I miss community 

And I’m at home. 

Still what do I know ?

I have to put up with Barry and Viv and until recently Tuggy 

Who let me know I’m not imagine things 

I am surrounded by a close community 

But it’s not mine 

And I can never be theirs, it’s a fact of life 

They are not a bad community, just so very different to me

And I believe they really want to keep it that way 

Yep they respect us as living in the midst of them , why would they not ? , we have too many kids for the typical English , they even respect or fear the hound from hell 

But they would rather we moved as they have an eye on the house 

It’s perfect, two lounges, our utility is almost a second kitchen, just needs a stove 

The front garden is big, plenty parking if you rip down the greenhouse 

And as Albert cuts the outside of the hedges 

He’s asked, when will you sell ?

Can we have first chance

Good ?

I don’t think so

Different?

Definately 

But we can buy without selling if necessary 

And if truth be known that’s why we bought this house

The Chinese guy refused to sell it to Asians 

He had sold it, but at the moment of exchanging contracts they said they wouldn’t meet the price 

And he refused to sell in spite of the fact they finally said they would meet it 

We watched groups of young guys hang around a house for sale across the road 

It would have made me feel uncomfortable if viewing 

An Asian guy bought it ,the groups melted away 

Well you can’t hang close to my house, Dence hedges surround it

The hound from hell patrols it

Wrong?

Perhaps not

It’s not just what we expect with our culture 

And that’s the problem

My culture is my culture

Theirs is theirs 

We can respect the differences 

But we aren’t going to meet 

Sandra


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