# School jokes



## 89052 (May 12, 2005)

The male teacher in a girls' school asked the science class: "Who can tell me what organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated? Mary, can you tell me?" 
Mary blushed furiously as she stood up. She said: "Sir, how dare you ask such a question? I will complain to my parents, who will complain to the Head." The male teacher was taken aback at first by Mary's reaction. Then, as understanding dawned on him, he called for another pupil, this time a volunteer. 
Lily put up her hand. "Yes, Lily?" 
"Sir, the correct answer is the iris of the eye." 
"Very good. Thanks, Lily," said the male teacher. He then turned to the 1st girl and said: "Well, Mary, I have 3 things to tell you: First, you have NOT done your homework. Second, you have a DIRTY mind. And thirdly, I fear, one day, you are going to be very disappointed."


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## 88903 (May 10, 2005)

*how do you*

a head mistress of an exclusive girls school has heard about some goings on behind the bike sheds and is worried about her girls so she decided to give a lecture in assembly the next day.
She stands in assembly and starts to tell the girls all about the dangers of sex . She has been talking for several minutes and senses that she has lost the interest of the girls. 
She slams her hand down hard on the desk and shouts
"IS HALF AN HOUR OF PLEASURE WORTH PROBLEMS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE"
there is silence for a minute as she glares round the hall, then a girl slowly raises her hand.
headmistress is pleased. she has got through and says "yes Felicity"
"Please Miss, How do you make it last half an hour"


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