# Dementia blog



## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

I've referred in a couple of posts here to my wife's dementia. So far it hasn't stopped us going away, often abroad, in the motorhome. However she recently took a turn for the worse and I'm not sure what will be possible in the future.

I've started a blog, partly as therapy and to share my experiences, but also to try to gain insights and tips from other people. It occurs to me that given the size of the membership and its age profile there may well be people on here who would be interested so here's the address:

Adventures with Dementia

Phil


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## DTPCHEMICALS (Jul 24, 2006)

We are carers for Lady p`s mum. Although she is capable of carrying on her daily life at home she does get flustered over silly things.

For example if a light bulb fails she will ring me up to go and change it. Sometimes that is not convenient as she is 15 miles away, so we ask her to write a note saying that I will call in the morning to fix it.
Within minutes she will have forgoten that she has phoned and written a note and rings me again., and again , and again.

It is more frustrating for the carers than the person with the condition.

Strange as it seems old routines are still in the memory and work well.
Every single day for two years she walked to the care home where father in law was resident.
Three years ago he passed away and we expected her to carry on with the routine of visiting. Strangley enough she never went after his death.

I wish you well as things get worse with dementia not better.
I hope you have a good familly suport behind you.

Lady p has three sisters who basicaly don`t care about mum.

dave p


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

I should have said that there's a comment facility on the blog and comments are very welcome.

Phil


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## locovan (Oct 17, 2007)

I have left a comment do you have to approve.


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## camallison (Jul 15, 2009)

Phil42 said:


> I should have said that there's a comment facility on the blog and comments are very welcome.
> 
> Phil


I have left a comment Phil. Good to compare notes and share experiences.

Colin


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

Can't edit the original post but as a former English teacher I was amazed to see a superfluous apostrophe in there. 'Its' meaning 'of its' doesn't have an apostrophe - follows the pattern of his and hers. My apologies!

Phil


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## locovan (Oct 17, 2007)

Phil42 said:


> Can't edit the original post but as a former English teacher I was amazed to see a superfluous apostrophe in there. 'Its' meaning 'of its' doesn't have an apostrophe - follows the pattern of his and hers. My apologies!
> 
> Phil


Doesnt matter your Raising Awareness that's what Counts :wink:


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## camallison (Jul 15, 2009)

Phil42 said:


> Can't edit the original post but as a former English teacher I was amazed to see a superfluous apostrophe in there. 'Its' meaning 'of its' doesn't have an apostrophe - follows the pattern of his and hers. My apologies!
> 
> Phil


Give's the pedant's 'something to pick at! 

Thanks for raising the awareness of this condition - it is good to know you are not alone!

Colin


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## Zebedee (Oct 3, 2007)

Phil42 said:


> Can't edit the original post but as a former English teacher I was amazed to see a superfluous apostrophe in there. 'Its' meaning 'of its' doesn't have an apostrophe - follows the pattern of his and hers. My apologies!
> Phil


What superfluous apostrophe?

I can't see one! :lol:

Dave

_(All part of the service. :wink: )_


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Following your Blog Phil,as in a professional capacity worked very 

closely with dementia sufferers (before retirement)

There is so much still to learn about dementia and raising awareness is an important factor

Take care

Aldra


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## mags52 (May 9, 2010)

What a beautifully written and poignant blog. Thank you for sharing it.
I cared for my late partner through motor neurone disease which is completely different but does involve that sense of slipping away - in her case from loss of speech. I kept a journal through the whole process and it was immensely helpful to me both during and after the illness.
I'm sure your blog will be the same but of course is available to others to help them too.
Ain't technology brilliant?


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## eddied (May 9, 2005)

*Second childhood*

 Thank you for this; very interesting blog. It seems to ease the weight on your shoulders when you can share the burden. Donna C and myself have been married 50 years in December. She is 79, and losing her memory very rapidly now. We had
to give up motorhoming a couple of years ago, because she is no longer comfortable outside her own surroundings. She is very active physically (although just been hospitalised for minor surgery). She knows exactly what is happening to her, which makes it even harder to bear. She confuses our children and grandchildren one with the other and so on. Can't remember who my brothers are. Has difficulty remembering the days of the week/months of the year. Her greatest difficulty seems to be the concepts of time/space. I do all the shopping now 'cos she is not comfortable with money/remembering what to buy where. She is totally autonomous when it comes to personal hygeine/dressing/fashion; which is one blessing. At the moment she has been prescribed a series of Vitamin B supplements, both injections/pills. Can't help feeling they are more of a palliative than anything though.
Anyway, you can always look behind you and find somebody much worse off than yourselves, so we carry on regardless. 
saluti,
eddied


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## DTPCHEMICALS (Jul 24, 2006)

Typical of what does happen.

Lady p took mum shopping this morning. I went later to paint a couple of ceilings in her bungalow.

Within ten minutes from returning from shopping she had forgot that she had been out and had dinner with Margaret.

Mum usually goes for a two hour walk in an afternoon with her neighbour.

As usual she went walking this afternoon.

Trouble was she had forgot that I was in a bedroom paining the ceiling and she locked me in.

On her return I asked if she had any spare candle bulbs to replace a couple of blown ones.

She went straight to a cabinet in the lounge and produced a pack with two bulbs. Tesco label on them.

She has not shopped at tescos for over four years.`

Dave p


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## an99uk (May 12, 2005)

An old neighbour of mine insisted that Ronald Regan, the Queen and the Pope had all visited her house. Sounds odd but she was right in a way, they were on the front page of her paper that she had delivered.
We stopped her papers and the visitations stopped for a while.

It was so sad to see the fear in her face whenever she got confused about something.

Reminiscence therapy can help, old photo albums, favourite music or movies that have some connection to her can be quite helpful when she is having a "difficult" period.

I used to count my neighbours previous life as 10 years BD. (before dementia) She had excellent recollection of the disco's of the 1960s, her Twist dresses :roll: so you don't have to always go as far back as Vera Lynn as they do on the TV.

I feel for you in what must seem like a lonely position at times, but I am sure she makes you laugh out loud as well with the amusing things she says.

Nice blog, keep it going.


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## mgw (Mar 27, 2007)

thanks for the blog will follow with intrest as the mother in law also suffers from Demantia


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

*eddied wrote:*


> She knows exactly what is happening to her, which makes it even harder to bear.


Yes, I agree. Sue has an unusual degree of awareness which does have a real downside - but I also feel that the awareness means she is more 'herself' than she would otherwise be, and this is definitely a plus.

Phil


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

I hope I've now made it possible for anyone who wants to leave comments on the blog to do so.

Phil


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

I can see from the blog stats that a fair number of views are coming via motorhomefacts so thanks to everyone who's had a look. This post may bring the blog to the attention of of others who might be interested. Don't forget, you are more than welcome to leave comments which are open to all on the blog.

Phil


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