# A Bad Day at the Office? Divers will appreciate this



## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

I was sent this little episode, read through it and I defy you NOT to laugh or have a smile while reading about this poor diver's bad day at the office ........... :lol: 


OHHHH!





Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy. Bob is a
commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana , he
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio
station 103 .5 on FM dial in Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job
experience contest.

Needless to say, she won. Read his letter below...

~Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. 

I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. 

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then
pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start
working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit.
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a
Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt
started to itch.

So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a
few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my
back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish
couldn't stick to it, however, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding
the jellyfish into the crack of my ass. I informed the dive supervisor
of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing
hysterically.

Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totalling thirty-five minutes
before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass
helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire
out, but I couldn't **** for two days because my ass was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass. Now
repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'

Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?

May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!


It certainly made me smile......... :lol: 

Dave


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## rayrecrok (Nov 21, 2008)

Hi. 

Woops this tale has been out for years and if you visit snopes they are sitting on the fence, but personally all the commi divers I know wear hot water dry suits that run on fresh water that has bacterial removing chemicals in solution, with filtered systems that return the hot water back to the heater as the recycled hot water is used by other divers on the loop as well..

And non of them wear brass hats, they usually have Siebe Gorman full face masks with comms as the preferred mask.

Elf n Safety rules in the most dangerous environment on the planet to make your living.


ray.


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Ray,

don't take it to heart (or backside), it is in Jokes and Trivia and is meant to be a bit of fun,

besides brass helmets went out 30 years ago (except in some special situations) and were a pain to wear (I tried one, once and that was enough!)

but the thoughts are amusing - hence it's inclsuion,

I sopmehow doubt that many of the posts in J&T are factually correct..... :lol:

but that does not stop them being amusing....

http://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/diver.asp

even snopes says it may not be true, but do enjoy it!

It is probably the product of someone who wanted to pen such an amusing anecdote but could not be bothered to check the facts......

Oh well, back to the grass cutting for me......

Dave :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Bubblehead (Mar 5, 2007)

Hi

As a diver I agree that hot water suit run on fresh not salt water / jelly fish mix, so the truth may be stretched a tad here, but still funny.

Standard diving rig (brass hat) was still in service with the RN until 1986. I did my tools (welding, cutting etc) course in it, fantastic bit of kit!

The rig of choice now for 'normal surface supplied diving is Kirby Morgan - either a band mask or helmet depending on the task, usually a helmet. Helmets are fun after 5+ hours work and you soon know what a sore neck is due to the weight.

I once had a hot water valve failure at depth, in winter. I tested the hot water flow with my hand and felt that the water was hot on the outside of the suit (Normal) but none of it was actually going into the suit, after about an hour I finally gave up as I couldn't move due to the cold. After much ribbing about being a wimp, no one took up my offer of the same dive without hot water connected 8O 

Life was fun underwater, a lot better than the desk I now seem to be glued to  

Old Divers never die they just smell that way :lol: 

Andy


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## marionandrob (May 14, 2005)

That was a bad day at the office for him

From the point of view of the jellyfish it was probably the worst day of it's life 8O 8O


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