# DIY Vasectomy



## Zebedee (Oct 3, 2007)

*Do not read this if you come from any of the places mentioned in the text below. You have been warned.* :roll: :roll:

After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was enough, as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't strong enough to nick one.

The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix the problem but it was expensive.

A less costly alternative was to go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and quickly count to 10.

The Scouser said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest guy in the world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me.'

'Trust me, it will do the job', said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count: '1, 2, 3, 4, 5,' at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Scotland, parts of Bradford and anywhere in Ireland.


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## JohnsCrossMotorHomes (Jul 21, 2007)

Zed,

Two bricks are cheaper, just don't get your thumbs in between as it hurts then.


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## Eamonn (Feb 19, 2007)

OOOOHHH......I think I will take issue with that and ask the mods to remove the reference to Ireland :wink:


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## geraldandannie (Jun 4, 2006)

At least he didn't say Birmingham, so this mod says it can stay :wink: 

Gerald


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## Zebedee (Oct 3, 2007)

Eamonn said:


> OOOOHHH......I think I will take issue with that and ask the mods to remove the reference to Ireland :wink:


Did try to protect your feelings Eamonn! :!:

Couldn't you read the warning? :wink: :wink:

Aarrrggggghhhhhhh Couldn't resist it.


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## Eamonn (Feb 19, 2007)

geraldandannie said:


> At least he didn't say Birmingham, so this mod says it can stay :wink:
> 
> Gerald


Obviously he didnt say Birmingham as he was talking about using a beer can not a curry box


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## vmeldrew (May 3, 2007)

I reckon the Scots, Irish and Bradfordians??? would have put the place names before the story, not after it. What does that say about Worcestershire I wonder!! Just a thought.



JohnsCrossMotorHomes said:


> Zed,
> 
> Two bricks are cheaper, just don't get your thumbs in between as it hurts then.


Is JohnsCrossMotorhomes speaking from experience?


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## rowley (May 14, 2005)

Quote--
What does that say about Worcestershire I wonder!! Just a thought.

All I can think of is SAUCE!


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## patman (Jan 1, 2007)

I thought it was only us Manc's who could take the micky out of scousers.
spykal....SPYKAL!


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## bigfoot (May 16, 2005)

Eamonn said:


> OOOOHHH......I think I will take issue with that and ask the mods to remove the reference to Ireland :wink:


And Liverpool!!!


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## bigfoot (May 16, 2005)

patman said:


> I thought it was only us Manc's who could take the micky out of scousers.
> spykal....SPYKAL!


since when has Yns Mon been part of Manchester?


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## patman (Jan 1, 2007)

bigfoot said:


> patman said:
> 
> 
> > I thought it was only us Manc's who could take the micky out of scousers.
> ...


Isn't Ynys Mon the extreme south of Manchester?


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