# Panic Buying - be afraid, be very afraid .....



## KeithChesterfield (Mar 12, 2010)

Zimmer frames and Mobility Scooters have been criss crossing urban areas as the Werthers Original panic buying spree heads through its third day.

The ever popular caramel flavoured sweet has been snaffled up by hordes of elderly men and women from shelves in Shops and Supermarkets across the wind swept snow covered United Kingdom as the ageing citizens fear running out of supplies.

An NHS representative urged them to consider the dangers of the icy snow covered roads and pavements as hundreds of Pensioners were taken to Hospital after falling down or falling under cars and buses still clutching the trophy sweets in their gnarled but strong hands.

“Beds, and Bed pans, are overflowing with determined older people and they may have to wait a long time for treatment. This means they will have sucked all their sweets in the corridors and the wrappers they leave lying around will be an environmental and hygienic disaster” 

A Spokesperson for Werthers said “I've never experienced anything like this in my 30 year career for the manufacturers. We can't keep up with the demand. Let's hope the cold snap passes as quickly as possible and we can return to some form of normality”

A lorry was hijacked by irate pensioners at a Motorway Service Station in the M1 yesterday afternoon and its 15 tons of Werthers had been removed when the Police recovered the vehicle near Sheffield.

PC Peter Lodd said “Feckin old gits, no feckin teeth the lot of 'em, but they can't 'alf suck them sweets quick”

A question was asked in the House of Lords about the worsening situation but any replies were drowned out by the sound of sucking and snoring in equal measure.

Anyone knowing the whereabouts of the stolen sweets or the perpetrators is asked to ring Help the Aged in Sheffield on 0114 268 2606

For your own protection do not attempt to approach or apprehend these walking stick wielding villains.


:grin2: :grin2: :grin2: :grin2:


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

Do you feel better now Keith


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## KeithChesterfield (Mar 12, 2010)

_Do you feel better now Keith_ :smile: :smile: :smile:

Much better now I've fought off the other doddering gits to buy my supply of Werthers, bottle of Brandy and Viagra tablets.

Up and at 'em !

:nerd: :nerd: :nerd: :nerd:


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

Viagra and "Up and at 'em" are a bad combination of words Keith


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