# I've just said goodbye to my bestie



## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

Today, I've just said goodbye to my bestie, well one of my besties - I have more than a few!


A former colleague and friend of 30 years passed away from cancer on Sunday night. When I moved to my new house 16 years ago we started commuting to work together and our friendship grew closer. Then when we both retired in 2004 we had much more time to spend with each other, going on 'coffee dates' as I used to call them. She was so popular, not surprisingly as she was truly everything you'd want a best friend to be, I had to 'book a date' with her at least a week ahead!



She was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer nearly 6 years ago. After a mastectomy and the usual regimen of chemo, radiotherapy and Tamoxifen she was in remission. Two years ago it reappeared and metastasized and recently spread to her lungs and brain. But it was her heart and lungs that couldn't cope with the impact of the 2nd round, new gen. chemo and they got her before the cancer was able to.


I spent an hour and a half chatting with her last Thursday afternoon and she seemed to be doing okay. Then on Saturday morning she had a setback - a fungal infection of the lungs - and they sent for her family, from Cape Town and Saudi. By Sunday night it was all over. So the memorial service was today and I'm not the only one who has a gaping hole in their lives. But on the plus side there were at least 20 former colleagues there and friendships were renewed. The building society where we worked really was a family.



I wasn't ready for another bereavement so soon. Going to see her in ICU was really difficult but I couldn't let her know that. Her daughter told me how much she'd valued my friendship and encouragement in her cancer journey and I'm really chuffed that I added value to her life. It's at times like these that one's belief in a benevolent afterlife is a great comfort. R.I.P. Maureen.


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## JanHank (Mar 29, 2015)

When I hear stories like that I am so glad its not me. How often I think how fortunate I was to twice have the cancers spotted early, removed and radio therapy no Chimo. I still have the mammogram every year even though it´s not necessary after 10 years, but my surgeon says he will carry on as long as I want to have it done. The last mammogram was last month, all clear.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Sorry for your loss Viv.


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## JanHank (Mar 29, 2015)

Sorry Viv, very selfish of me not to have first said I'm sorry to hear about you friend.


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## nicholsong (May 26, 2009)

Viv


Sorry for that news and for your loss.


I lost an old school friend last week, who also had a boat in Poros, Greece. He was a difficult bastard but all of our group of four from that era, who have been in touch in the last couple of days, have agreed we will miss him. He had many talents - languages, ski instructor, avalanche inspector, sailor - but people skills lasted 2 days:wink2:



An aside; the group of four, going back to 1995, are in UK (Kent and Cumbria), Marmaris and I in Poland, but the boating community are maybe stronger than the MH one - since we all had more time in winter in one place and also helped out with repairs/ Christmas etc.


Geoff


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

So sorry for your loss, Viv.

True friendships are a blessing. She will have valued yours. 

Tough time for you. Take care of yourself.

Pat


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## rayrecrok (Nov 21, 2008)

Remember what you had, not what you have lost then you will feel less sad..

ray.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

So sorry Viv.
As we age so do all around us and some are not so fortunate as us.

Hurggssssss
Ray.


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## jo662 (Jul 27, 2010)

So sad to hear about your loss Viv.

R.I.P. Maureen


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

JanHank said:


> When I hear stories like that I am so glad its not me. How often I think how fortunate I was to twice have the cancers spotted early, removed and radio therapy no Chimo. I still have the mammogram every year even though it´s not necessary after 10 years, but my surgeon says he will carry on as long as I want to have it done. The last mammogram was last month, all clear.


Me too Jan!! Although I've had radio twice and chemo once. All stage 1's thankfully! Just had my mammo done too, nothing to report! Docs here think you should carry on indefinitely. In fact my medical scheme feel so strongly about it, the mammo is free. To validate that (another) bestie recently lost her Mum to breast cancer and she was in her 90's but elected not to have treatment. It was a first diagnosis too. It's mostly age-related so why stop checking when you get old??? Stay on track Jan. Even if it's a snowball's chance.:surprise::surprise::surprise:


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