# Ziltch on TV tonight.



## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Sometimes I wonder why we bother getting the Radio Times and today is one of those days.
Apart from some old fottage of Tommy Cooper and Roy Orbison's life, there is absolute trash on the box tonight. imho.:crying:
ITV is pathetic and BBC is all repeats.

Unlike wed and thurs and everything happens at 9pm.

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

I hardly bother with scheduled TV these days Ray. I just watch what I like online. Plenty of streaming or download sites. Just hook your PC or whatever to the tv if you want big screen with an HDMI cable and away you go. If you have a VPN you can watch iPlayer as well and there is tons of stuff on there.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

The one and only time I did 'hook' our big TV up to our internet it took so long to track down anything else we just might have wanted to watch and then it 'buffered' so much as to be annoying.
Never done it since and with over 200 channels of crap my wife is very happy to go to sleep in front of clutching the remote. We do record lots but again we can't delete anything as again my wife likes to watch em over and over again.
Sad innit.!!!!! Especially hour after hour of the bluddy Food Channel. Although she loves PBS America, Yesterday and Dave.

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Our broadband connection here is not fantastic (about 6mbps) but its more than enough for streaming. I Think you need at least 1mbps to stream without buffering but I download stuff generally though first if its a series rather than stream. Sometimes ill leave it over night then I can watch them without an internet connection. You can download stuff in iPlayer as well if you get their app. I am guessing that will work with a VPN in France but Im not 100% sure. I reckon its the way TV will go, it is already. The days of looking at a TV guide and deciding what to watch from a limited schedule are numbered I think. So they should be really.


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## GMJ (Jun 24, 2014)

We watched the Tommy Cooper documentary...great stuff. That man really made me laugh:grin2:

Graham :smile2:


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Maybe it's an age thing Barry. I am happy to wait and anticipate the next episode or film. So far trying to get online content is a pain for me and impossible for wife. 
We do get 6.6 mbps usually and can watch stuff on the large PC monitor but prefer the big screen in lounge on HD. Plus there sub titles for American so called speech.

Although with all the repeats over the Christmas period we do have 50 or 60 recorded films to fall back on. But I personally like News and Current Affairs. 
Went to the flix yesterday to see Kingsmen, The Golden Circle. As it's now trying to please the Americans I had trouble hearing all the dialogue. I will now wait until it's on TV and put subtitles on to get all the nuances. Actually I thought it ott compared to the original Kingsmen.

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

I think it will come though Ray. These smart TVs already have internet access and apps on them for iplayer etc. I dont have one but I think on some you can pretty much get internet content but I gather they are a bit clunky. I dont think we will be far off just being able to say what you want to watch and it will find it. The trouble with choice though is knowing what s out there. There are websites now where you put in the name of something you liked and it will find you something similar but the choices are massive. Too massive as you need to sift through all the dross, read the reviews and finally find something that you like. 

I dont think there has ever been a better time for watching stuff though. Some great shows out there now but I think films are not what they were. I can count on one hand the really great movies Ive seen in the past five years.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

I just can't see it that way Barry.
My high tech nephew in Madrid is always banging on about internet TV as "The way forward" His it terrible and buffers all the time. I have never managed to watch one single program/film in the 5 years we have been going there. It utterly crap. He farts about with his iPad and Apple Box and remotes all the time. Bugger that.
OK if you have a super fast broadband it might work but all the faffing about finding something and occupying the main TV when everyone else is not very patiently waiting for something to happen, when they just want to select a channel that takes ONE SECOND. 

Gimmee a proper TV with freeview and freesat inputs and it just works.
If you don't know whats out there why do you need it? 
Even with a VPN the BBC iPlayer won't let me in. It actually says i'm using a VPN and trying to conceal I'm not in UK.

Ray.


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## GMJ (Jun 24, 2014)

We bought a smart TV for our snug but after a week swapped it for the lad's TV that was in his bedroom. Mrs GMJ watches a bit in the afternoons when she needs to rest but freeview suffices tbh with less faffing around as well.

I do take the point that smart TVs are the present and future but it is wholly dependent upon good broadband 100% of the time. I'll be buggered if I'm going to pay for fibre or ultra-fast. I'll wait until others have covered all the development costs and it becomes standard offering...

Graham :smile2:


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Its not long ago we had dial up modems (remember them?) and TVs weighed about a ton and had glass screens (I Still have on in my front room but nobody goes in there).

Bandwidth is just a technical hurdle. Everything is going internet now. Even phones and phone calls. Maybe it will come via the mobile networks I Dont know but come it will. I agree its crap at the moment and a faff but when eventually sitting down to watch something YOU decide to watch is as easy as flicking channels on a remote everyone will want it.

There will be no need to record stuff either, you just decide to watch it as and when you like.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

But not yet.!!!!!

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Well it has for me Ray. Its what I do now. It just needs someone to get their act together and make it easy.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

What can be easier than one remote ................................. channel, volume, record and sub titles.??

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

raynipper said:


> What can be easier than one remote ................................. channel, volume, record and sub titles.??
> 
> Ray.


You remind me of Mrs D Ray about fifteen years ago when I gave her a PC in the office and Internet she said "I cant imagine why anyone would want the Internet, whats if for?" 

Your lucky if you have one remote. Most houses I go in there seem to be at least three! Lets say in the future you wanted to watch Peaky Blinders Season 2 episode 4. I see no reason why you couldnt just say that into a remote and the TV would find it. That technology is there now. Or maybe a wireless tablet interface instead of a remote. Just say or tap "news" and it shows you your favourite news channels. tap on one and it plays on the TV. I guess if it still exists you could still watch scheduled TV as well if you wanted to but why bother? Just watch it when you choose to.


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

There was Show Jumping on the red button!!! Live from Olympia. Can't tell you how excited I was when they announced it. Why don't they show it more often? It is such a lovely spectacle. Beautiful horses, colourful characters, exciting action. Went to bed a happy bunny.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

barryd said:


> You remind me of Mrs D Ray about fifteen years ago when I gave her a PC in the office and Internet she said "I cant imagine why anyone would want the Internet, whats if for?"
> 
> Your lucky if you have one remote. Most houses I go in there seem to be at least three! Lets say in the future you wanted to watch Peaky Blinders Season 2 episode 4. I see no reason why you couldnt just say that into a remote and the TV would find it. That technology is there now. Or maybe a wireless tablet interface instead of a remote. Just say or tap "news" and it shows you your favourite news channels. tap on one and it plays on the TV. I guess if it still exists you could still watch scheduled TV as well if you wanted to but why bother? Just watch it when you choose to.


OK Barry but you know yourself some modern tech is tech for tech's sake. Like lots of gizmos in cars now.

Oddly enough we have kept the Peaky Blinders recorded in the Humax along with many other progs we (wife) might want to watch again, two clicks. And many others. But I personally can't be bothered to watch things over again. I find I'm recalling the dialogue and next scene and go do something else.
Anyway, yes voice recognition will eventually get better to the state of actually being useable. We have ten news channels now, can't see me wanting to fiddle arse about trying to call it up via the net with my wife huffing and blowing beside me missing the Food Channel or some other old crap. 
Again my monitor is a TV and can have PiP but never use it as the convenience of a dedicated TV and sat remote is so simple. Ah that's it. Simplicity.!!!!!!
If we had our big TV connected to the Net, our 53 year long marriage might quickly end as I would want 'mail' and wife would want a B&W war film.

Do these same houses you go into Barry have the three remotes plonked on the settee.??? That's another thing I hate as they often get sat on and have to be wrapped in tape or slide down the cushions to be found next week.

Now back to really important things. My AOL Desktop is deceased, is no longer, it's a dead Desktop.:crying:

Ray.


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## Spacerunner (Mar 18, 2006)

I have a smart TV and Virgin media. I can always find something to watch, not sure about the quality of content though.
If all else fails it can show YouTube and I'm never at a loss to find something interesting or entertaining on there.
Been watching a series on some guy who built and lived in a log cabin in North America. Fail Army is good for a laugh and Bad Day At Work has me chuckling.
I have six remotes but Samsung has done a clever thing that it can use one remote for everything and also allows voice control over a limited range.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

raynipper said:


> OK Barry but you know yourself some modern tech is tech for tech's sake. Like lots of gizmos in cars now.
> 
> Oddly enough we have kept the Peaky Blinders recorded in the Humax along with many other progs we (wife) might want to watch again, two clicks. And many others. But I personally can't be bothered to watch things over again. I find I'm recalling the dialogue and next scene and go do something else.
> Anyway, yes voice recognition will eventually get better to the state of actually being useable. We have ten news channels now, can't see me wanting to fiddle arse about trying to call it up via the net with my wife huffing and blowing beside me missing the Food Channel or some other old crap.
> ...


Oh dont get me wrong Ray. I agree with you. I hate "Tech". Bores me to death. If you walked around our house, not only was it around when Nelson was a pup, so was most of the stuff in it. Voice recognition although its been around for donkeys is still a bit naff but its getting better and you feel a bit of a berk using it. The one Sage use for their support line isnt bad. Its improving. What I was suggesting though I think would be useful Tech and I think it will come, eventually. The internet is where its all at though and will end up being the conduit for everything we do from driving out cars to making toast. Although lets face it, most people will still use it to view funny cats and porn. 

Yeah you often find complicated looking remotes in odd places. Imagine when we can get shot of all them one day.

Sorry to hear about AOL. On the plus side as you convert to platforms that most people use at least someone on here might be able to help you.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

But it all hinges on getting a good speed and reliable connection.
Living sorta outside a town/village all our power and phone lines are still up poles. Although some larger towns and villages are putting them underground but just inside the town.
We have known 5 weeks off because of bungling sfr 'technicians' and now and again when work is going on we can loose phone for the odd hour/day. We still had sat TV.
Roll on fibre as we were promised it by Sarko years ago but it's no happened. 
Ironically sfr charge me an extra €1 because I can watch 'content' on my portable devices.!!!!! Oh really.?? But you can't get that €1 taken off.

Back to AOL and steam driven stuff.

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Yep it does. There are still parts of Teesdale that have no broadband at all. Mind you most of them in those areas probably still think WW2 is still going. 

The issues being that its just not profitable to service or upgrade some far flung places. They will always be at a disadvantage. There are ways around it such as Satellite or independent delivery of broadband, 3 or 4g masts or wifi systems but they are not straight forward and expensive. One company I work with has built its own network of wifi nodes firing out 20mbps connections to remote villages from Harrogate all the way up to here 40 miles away. Works well but its a private firm just taken over by another firm as the bloke that set it all up retired and sold it on. Its dependant on them keeping going and it remaining profitable. The government spent £2million quid on a similar wifi project for the Dales a few years ago. There were only about 100 people that signed up! Of course when the money ran out it went bust and they all got cut off and back to square one.


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

raynipper said:


> Sometimes I wonder why we bother getting the Radio Times and today is one of those days.
> Apart from some old fottage of Tommy Cooper and Roy Orbison's life, there is absolute trash on the box tonight. imho.:crying:
> ITV is pathetic and BBC is all repeats.
> 
> ...


I would cancel your subscription, it's all online now tha nose   I get an email from here http://www.tvguide.co.uk/ every day tell me all I need to know, and a heads up on any new programmes.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Kev, you sound like our Brit friends up the road suggesting we get The TV Times. My wife loves the articles and stories in The Radio Times also some history. You don't get that online and I don't have to stop what I'm doing to explain or write down whats on.

We can't get it sent to France but every newsagent within 100k has it in stock.

Ray.


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## dghr272 (Jun 14, 2012)

Caught the ELO concert at Wembley on BBC 2 last night, that took me back. :-D

Good to see some of us Old Crinkles can still enjoy a good concert. :-D

On iPlayer if interested.

Terry


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

They do know how to capture the feel of when they first recorded their stuff.


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## Mrplodd (Mar 4, 2008)

Yeah BUT.........

Everything in your utopia will be 100% dependent on internet access and there are huge swathes of most countries where there simple isn’t (and probably never will be) any.

Then you are left with just the mobile phone network (if you have a signal) and the subsequent data charges which are unlikely to ever be cheap enough to allow unlimited data at reasonable cost. 

As for Tommy Cooper I reckon he should have been prosecuted for criminal deception because I NEVER found him anything other than mildly amusing at best. Clearly a lot of people DID find him hilarious, but I simply cannot see why. 

Andy


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## Matchlock (Jun 26, 2010)

Mrplodd said:


> Yeah BUT.........
> 
> Everything in your utopia will be 100% dependent on internet access and there are huge swathes of most countries where there simple isn't (and probably never will be) any.
> 
> ...


And what5s wrong with Tommy Andy?

Two Aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.
The ceremony was rubbish but the Reception was Brilliant.

Man goes to the doc, with a strawberry growing out of his head.
Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."

"Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home."
"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. "
"Is it common? "
"It's not unusual."

A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only clingfilm for shorts.
The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? "
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and
examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have
 to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed? "
"No, because he's really heavy"

Guy goes into the doctor's.
"Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside
"How's that?"
"Don't you start"

"Doctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's."
"Well you can't say fairer than that then"

Two elephants walk off a cliff...... boom boom!

What's brown and sounds like a bell?
DUNG

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.

So I went to the dentist. The dentist said say "Aahh".
I said "Why?"
He said "My dog's died.'"

So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's
speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'

So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said 'Is that the local swimming
baths?' He said, 'It depends where you're calling from.'

So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.'
He said 'I'm not stopping you.'

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in
my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my
older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it's Colin.

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said
'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and
said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again. He rang up a third
time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree and a
policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I said 'I careered off
the road.'

I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?"
I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it."

Two cannibals eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to
you?"

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other
was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

I went out driving to do some shopping and parked my car.
Someone left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'
"So that was nice."

A man walked into the doctors, The doctor said " I haven't seen you in a long
time " The man replied "I know I've been ill"

A man walked into the doctors, he said "I've hurt my arm in several places"
The doctor said "well don't go there any more"

I had a ploughman's lunch the other day. He wasn't very happy.

I was driving down the motorway with my bird the other day when we both got a
bit frisky and decided to do something about it. So we decided we'd take the
next exit, but it was a turn-off.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

Bloke goes to the doctors with a lettuce leaf sticking out of his arse.
 Doctor says "hmmmm that's strange"
Bloke replies "that's just the tip of the iceberg"

Two peanuts walk into a bar
One was a-salted

A jump-lead walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but >don't
start anything."

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry we don't >serve food in
here."

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says "Pint
please, and one for the road."

Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly I was
artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly.
"It's true, straight up, no bull!"

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I think I've lost an
electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm
positive..."

I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't
reach the meat off the top shelf. And he said, "no, the steaks are too high."

My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. He was pulled in by a strong currant.

A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor,
doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".

I went to a seafood disco last week.... and pulled a muscle.

A man walks into doctor's office. "What seems to be the problem?" asks the
doc. "It's... um...well... I have five penises." replies the man " Blimey!"
says the doctor, "How do your trousers fit?"
"Like a glove."

Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with
hundreds and thousands.
Police say that he topped himself.

And finaly:

Mary had a little lamb, she also had a cat
Along came tommy Cooper, and killed it:
Just like that, or was it like that, He,He,He


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## DJMotorhomer (Apr 15, 2010)

*New zealand tv*

Hi All

Try NEW ZEALAND tv....it is awful lol thank god there is Netflix

DJM


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Miracle on 34th. Street has been on every week for three weeks now and my wife has watched it every time. I'm sick of it and all the repeats.

Ray.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Mrplodd said:


> Yeah BUT.........
> 
> Everything in your utopia will be 100% dependent on internet access and there are huge swathes of most countries where there simple isn't (and probably never will be) any.
> 
> ...


Over eighty percent of people in developed nations already use the Internet though Andy and even in third world nations where the percentage is lower it is growing, an interesting article here. https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...rnet-users-study-says/?utm_term=.0cd1f99c5ccd

on the whole 47% of the worlds population already use the internet.

Like all technology though it is never going to be available to all but the people behind it wont care as long as there are enough subscribers in the places they can make a profit and there already is so it will come. Its already here. I dunno what I pay for my internet access, probably about ten or fifteen quid a month but its totally unlimited and cheap. Its not long ago I think I had a 10gb limit and it was more expensive. Just 15 years ago or so I was selling .5 mbs (yes half a MB) broadband at £90 a month into businesses and they couldnt get it fast enough. It was a massive breakthrough over dial up and everyone in the office could share it. The commissions were fantastic but like all things it got faster and cheaper and there were more choices of provider. Great for the consumers but crap for my bank balance but thats the way it should be.

Mark my words. Ten years from now we will laugh the way we used to sit down in front of a telly and watch scheduled programs. Its not that long ago either we had a flipping test card and a little white dot which pretty much told you to go to bed.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Ten years from now Barry and I will be lucky to hold a remote and see across the room.

Ray.


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

Depends how much Leffe he has tonight Ray, could be sooner >


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Just looked down the films being shown over Christmas and everyone is a multiple repeat.
You can only watch the same films so many times. I can't find anything new to record. Glad we still have Panorama and Tonight to fall back on.

That bluddy Miracle on 34th. street in only on again on Christmas Day. That's 5 times in the last two weeks.!!!!

Ray.


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## GMJ (Jun 24, 2014)

We always buy a new DVD for Xmas Eve and Xmas Day. Sometimes for Boxing Day too. I then sell them on Fleabay and get 80% of the cost back.

This year its the latest Harry Potter Fantastic Beats film and Hacksaw Ridge. I was supposed to get Dunkirk to day but forgot!

We tend to put a DVD on as we have the 'olds' for Xmas Day and they like watching a film...or mostly falling asleep in front of a film!

Graham :smile2:


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

It's deadly. Mrs. Ray drops off soon after the 'repeat' has started, clutching the remote. I try to prise it off her only to be told "I was watching that" with eyes closed.
I take the easy option and get back to the PC.

Ray.


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## Drew (May 30, 2005)

*"I take the easy option and get back to the PC"*

Have you not fixed it yet Ray???


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Drew said:


> *"I take the easy option and get back to the PC"*
> Have you not fixed it yet Ray???


It aint broke Drew, just the new AOL takes some getting used to and more time to do what I could do in one click.
Then there's the mobile that won't initiate Kindle.
Plus transferring everything we might possibly need onto the one we take to Portugal.
And the day to day communications ..................... beats repeat after repeat.

Ray.


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