# Another grandchild



## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

We it seems we have another grandchild on the way

Due in May , number 12

I never thought at 75 we would have another Grandchild

Possibly a great grandchild 

And I’m really sad at my feeling 

It hasn’t stirred the excitement 

Are we allowed to say , gosh we thought we had enough ?

But Im delighted for my son, his first marriage meant no children

Except our adopted Izzy

And that’s what is important 

But 

As time goes on I’m getting less excited , less able to deal with babies 

And that’s the Cruz I think

I revelled in Megan, my first , still do 

Wasn’t to bad in Alex my second 

Young Albert well, he is and will always be 

Beyond that I’ve just loved them all

Archer I don’t really know 

Will I know the new one any better ?

No I won’t , because as with archer I won’t be having him/ her 

Her mum will

And will I fight to have them 

No I won’t 

It’s enough already

Sandra


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## jiwawa (Jun 22, 2007)

aldra said:


> Are we allowed to say , gosh we thought we had enough ?


Definitely not!!

Though I understand your diminishing enthusiasm!


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## Wilmannie (Feb 7, 2010)

Congratulations! There’s always room for another little one!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Of course there is Annie 

It just I’m less able to be hands on these days, which is what I imagined happened by the time great grandchildren came along 

I don’t babysit babies anymore , I used to have a large selection of toys for the grandkids when they were younger but they have long since gone to the charity shop or to my daughter to take to disadvantaged kids ( she’s a health visitor)

I am about to buy some for her to donate at Christmas, they make up Christmas presents for the kids in poorer families 

Can’t decide whether I need to start buying in some more too keep here, toys that is not grandkids >

Was about to put the high chair in the loft as Archer has outgrown it , but I guess I’ll need it again !!!

Less than enthusiastic grandma to be :grin2::grin2::wink2:

Sandra


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Grannies have a compulsion to buy new things for their grandkids that only last a few months when the world is drowning in virtually new items heading for landfill.

Ray.


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

Congratulations Sandra. I am sure this new little one will bring his or her own personality that you will love.

Ray, it is funny you should say that about a compulsion to buy for grandchildren. It came over me too. I have resisted it for two reasons. The first is that most new parents get given loads of second hand, but never worn, clothes to start with. The second is that my daughter's mother in law is a compulsive shopper. Every time we visit there is a new stack of stuff that she has bought and given to them and this is before the baby news came along. My daughter and son in law get exasperated with it all. They both earn good money and so are able to buy whatever they want. Son in law is also a bit of a "designer label" kind of person so will have his own opinions on what his baby wears etc.

I will, of course, offer to buy a pram or cot or whatever it is that they want but will keep my powder dry for now.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

It's a different world now Pat. Consumerism is rife even for those pleading poverty with everything on 'tick'.
We have just got a new Great grandson and luckily our grand daughter is sensible in fending off all the 'gifts' and using much from her daughter of six years. 
We send the small token cash gift but can see the new borne is not swamped with unnecessary stuff.

Just got a video today of six year old mothering the new borne. But everything is on Facebook for all to see forever.

Ray.


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

My daughter is a very level headed woman and has already turned down "stuff" from her sister in law. She was offered a baby walker and her comment, to me, was "they must be joking - I am a Physio and no child of mine is going in a baby walker!"


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Congratulations Sandra, we are very pleased for you, although, of course Christmas becomes ever more expensive.... 🤔. 🙄. 🙃

But, the most important thing about a Grandparent is the knowledge and xperience that you carry that can be shared IF NEEDED. It is also great to be able to spoil in minor ways or perhaps allow the littl'un to do things that the parents might not.....

You may not be as much "hands on" but all of us know that you love will grow and will rapidly include the May delivery.

Do let us know whether it is a potentially expensive grand-daughter, or a potentially active grandson.

Congratulations. 😊


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## jiwawa (Jun 22, 2007)

Oooh, you're on very dangerous, sexist grounds there Dave!

My experience is that both sexes are equally expensive!!


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Probably true, but we paid in full for three daughters weddings and not our son's - he refused offers although a sum of money did appear in his bank account and did not get returned.......


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Well I’d say grand daughters 

You probably won’t pay for their wedding

But I’m not holding my breath

It’s seems we’ve paid for just about everything to do with this girl 

Were paying for her to become a lawyer 

And she will pay us back

I think, possibly maybe 

And I always thought girls were more expensive 

Until I met young Albert and his designer clothes

£270 for his Gucci belt which he loves , it’s just a leather belt 

To be fair he has few clothes , but all of them designer 

But what do I know?

The older I get the less I know >

And the less I want to know

Sandra


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

raynipper said:


> Grannies have a compulsion to buy new things for their grandkids that only last a few months when the world is drowning in virtually new items heading for landfill.
> 
> Ray.


Don't depress me further

I am suffering from absolutely no compulsion to buy anything

Remotely grandkid related

Sandra


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

BUT May is still a fair way away and feelings change....


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## H1-GBV (Feb 28, 2006)

And no reason for them to be any different in activities neither!

In fact, perhaps the ONLY guaranteed differences will be in toileting and reproduction.

Gordon


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## H1-GBV (Feb 28, 2006)

Penquin said:


> Probably true, but we paid in full for three daughters weddings and not our son's - he refused offers although a sum of money did appear in his bank account and did not get returned.......


Both our daughters paid for their own weddings and it is something which I have "advertised" to all of my pupils at school. At one parent's evening a father of a Y10 girl shook my hand and said that his daughter told him she would pay for her own wedding: viva la revolution!

Gordon


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

H1-GBV said:


> And no reason for them to be any different in activities neither!
> 
> In fact, perhaps the ONLY guaranteed differences will be in toileting and reproduction.
> 
> Gordon


I hope you are encouraging granddaughters

In who can pee furthest competitions with grandsons

To insist "no hands " > >

Wasn't sure what you meant by toileting , both sit down to wee when young

And

Both sit down to wee when old.........eventually

Although those keen to retain a semblance their youthful selves

End up peeing all over the seat >

Sandra :wink2:


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

Ha ha Sandra!

When our daughter was small she witnessed some boys peeing up a wall. She waited until they had gone away and then tried to beat their efforts!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Ignore it all pat

You are about to be a grandma 

That first moment is unbelievable 

Even I remember that :wink2::grin2:

Of course I love them all

And they me 

They are all individuals 

Some follow our work ethic 

Well all of them 

Except

Our young Albert who follows no one 

And I watch him and think

Once upon a time I could have been you 

But I won’t tell him that 

Well not yet, I’ll wait and see 

Will this child of ours make it on his own terms 

This child of ours, no this grandchild of ours , the edges are blurred 

I hope so

But if not

Well as for all of them we are in the background

Sandra

And it so important to me to be in the background


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

H1-GBV said:


> Both our daughters paid for their own weddings and it is something which I have "advertised" to all of my pupils at school. At one parent's evening a father of a Y10 girl shook my hand and said that his daughter told him she would pay for her own wedding: viva la revolution!
> 
> Gordon


Our only daughter paid for her own wedding. They decided to have the "big
wedding" my opinion was that they should pay for it. They seem comfortable with that though, secretly, I wonder if they thought we would write a cheque. I did buy her wedding dress for her just because I love her and I loved the dress she chose. I think a big wedding is an extravagance that could be avoided but they wanted it and it was an absolutely amazing occasion. I am sure that they were very proud of their achievement.
I wonder, when they needed IVF, whether they regretted it but that is a life lesson they need to learn. Apart from that if I paid for it I would want a say in the way the money was spent and that could have ruined a beautiful relationship


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Well I have four daughters 

Close in age, and I am not really into weddings or anything else remotely related

So they sorted it out between themselves 

And each were given a sum of money to do with as they pleased 

Added to the fact they all lived with their partners prior to their marriage 

And certainly didn’t need giving away 

In my opinion they had by passed that stage 

Of course that’s common now

And my grand daughter although doesn’t live with her partner certainly shares a “ married “ relationship 

And she too will be given a sum of money to do with as she pleases 

One daughter made her sister the most beautiful wedding dress 

One managed a fantastic wedding on £ 1000 pounds, and chose to use the rest for different things 

I sound an awful mum 

I married in a second hand dress 

On the morning of my wedding, I dressed alone 

My mum in law decided I couldn't dress there , which was the arrangement until the last moment

I accidentally tore my veil , sat on the bed alone and sobbed, I was 19 years old 

It was a big wedding, his parents paid for it all 

But our friends were limited 

My girls were surrounded by their sisters 

I never really felt that I could add anything to that 

But maybe I made them close to each other

Sandra


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

But hey

I’ve been married to this guy for 55 yrs to date 

Through thick and thin 

Often thin 

And we have 6 wonderful kids 

11 going on twelve brilliant grandkids

Ok one is not so brilliant , but only in our understanding of what he should be 

A law unto himself 

Maybe a new age kid 

Maybe I would have bucked the trend 

If I’d had me as backup

Sandra


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Congratulations Sandra. The Christmas and Birthday list must be horrendous!!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

It will get better over time Barry

As we start to forget who they all are >

Got to be some advantage to getting old, haven’t found many yet

Although being retired has its advantages 

Especially on cold winter mornings:grin2:

Sandra


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

I"m tempted to say congratulations too ... but then what have you done to bring about this happy event? Diddly squat! (Wink, wink.) 



To be fair, most parents don't need THEIR parents to do anything, crises excepted. It's often the grandparents who usurp the parents' role for their own gratification and endow it with greater importance than it deserves.


All that is required is to like the grandchildren and let them know it, love them unreservedly and enjoy and give whatever YOU feel like giving or doing.


I'll sign off before the Granny Police set out to get me,


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

PS. Cat...pigeons...tongue...cheek. All in the name of fun.


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