# Feeling so verydown



## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Feeling really down tonight

Had just managed to get my mind round melanoma

And to try to live a normal life 

But this latest prostate cancer has thrown me
Trying to pack the van, but can't really concentrate

Just can't see it's worth it anymore

And everything takes so long and I can't organise it all

Just feel so very tired

Aldra


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## Geriatricbackpacker (Aug 21, 2012)

Sandra, take a few minutes out and have some time for yourself and let it all out; scream, shout, cry or throw things. I think you may be juggling too many balls in the air and something has got to give. 
You were excited about your trip so you need to get back in that frame of mind. Albert is obviously so appreciative of your support and strength but I am sure he will understand a wobble or two. 
I am sure you have got the most important things ready for the off, you, Albert and that hound of yours, everything else you get over there. 
Wishing you both all the best 

Terry


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Of course it's worth it Sandra, prostate cancer is NOT a killer, many men die with it, few die from it.

Yes it is there and yes it needs attention, but waking up each day is a bonus, waking up each day in your MH in a different place is an adventure.

Your life has been full of adventures - you have done things most of could only dream of, that pattern will continue and your family will make sure that it will. You are surrounded by love so please think of the future. not the "what if" scenario.

The best thing about MHF as you know, is the support offered, you have benefitted from some of that during the melanoma, don't think you have run out yet - 'cos you haven't yet scratched the surface.....

Enjoy packing the MH - it is the start of another day in your adventure we call life.

See you soon (we hope),

Dave and Lesley


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## suedew (May 10, 2005)

Geriatricbackpacker said:


> Sandra, take a few minutes out and have some time for yourself and let it all out; scream, shout, cry or throw things. I think you may be juggling too many balls in the air and something has got to give.
> You were excited about your trip so you need to get back in that frame of mind. Albert is obviously so appreciative of your support and strength but I am sure he will understand a wobble or two.
> I am sure you have got the most important things ready for the off, you, Albert and that hound of yours, everything else you get over there.
> Wishing you both all the best
> ...


quote from Penquin
Of course it's worth it Sandra, prostate cancer is NOT a killer, many men die with it, few die from it.

Yes it is there and yes it needs attention, but waking up each day is a bonus, waking up each day in your MH in a different place is an adventure.

Your life has been full of adventures - you have done things most of could only dream of, that pattern will continue and your family will make sure that it will. You are surrounded by love so please think of the future. not the "what if" scenario.

The best thing about MHF as you know, is the support offered, you have benefitted from some of that during the melanoma, don't think you have run out yet - 'cos you haven't yet scratched the surface.....

Enjoy packing the MH - it is the start of another day in your adventure we call life.

See you soon (we hope),

Dave and Lesley quote

Sandra, Terry, Dave and Lesley have put it all so much better than I could.
get that chin up after the shouting screaming and throwing things love to you both

Sue


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## listerdiesel (Aug 3, 2012)

Aldra:

Remember the picture of Eve in the motorhome this last week?

http://www.motorhomefacts.com/ftopic-190473.html (4th page)

Spends her day with a pipe in her throat giving her medicine. She is chained to a respirator 24 hours a day, and only 5-6 years old.

You've been fairly lucky with life and really only just starting to hit problems.

Count your blessings, give Albert a hug & a kiss and carry on packing.  

Peter


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## Nethernut (Jun 4, 2008)

Hey, if it isn't all packed, so what you can still go away, can always buy more underwear on holiday. Just get in the van and go, chill out and enjoy your trip away. Problems can be dealt with when you get home!

Jan


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## bigfrank3 (Mar 26, 2007)

To quote from Eric Idle's song, "Always look on the bright side of life". 

It can be hard but keep trying and count your blessings. Just think of of all the fun we will be having this coming weekend.

Frank.


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## MEES (Apr 20, 2006)

Have a good cry
A large tipple of something
Why not let yourself go down for a little while Then the only way is up!!!
Get away with those fruit cakes remember you do NOT have to be superwomen all the time.
Hugs
Margaret x


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## bigfrank3 (Mar 26, 2007)

removed as duplicate


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

You are. All so great

I'll try

Aldra


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## rayrecrok (Nov 21, 2008)

> aldra"]You are. All so great
> 
> I'll try
> 
> Aldra


Hey up you will all be OK... And it's bingo on Saturday night and beer will be at club prices. :wink: ...

Being maudling will not be allowed this weekend....

ray.


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

I feel for you this evening Sandra, but please remember that prostate cancer can be treated very effectively. Life is always one day at a time, it always was. So just get on with treasuring those days as best you can, Alan.


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## angelaa (Feb 14, 2011)

Know where you are coming from. My husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2010 on April fools day. I was devastated, he took it in his stride. They had to operate and take prostate out, but he had the all clear and discharged from the hospital in October 2013. He was told to have psa checks at the doctors every 6 months, which he has had last week. Enjoy your holiday, everything will work out ok.


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## Wilmannie (Feb 7, 2010)

They say that when the going gets tough the tough get going. 

Put the smile back on as soon as you've stopped crying, Sandra, you can manage. 
Best wishes & God Bless.


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

So sorry Sandra to hear this and I missed your post on Early Birds as I hardly ever read it.

As others have said its treatable and as Dave said most people die with it not from it.

I understand you feeling down though. Stuff like this can rock your world and all you can do is turn to your friends for support. You have plenty of them on here! And the good news is that come Friday we will be all lining up for that Group hug although I draw the line at snogging Albert. Oh go on then!  

Easy to say but try and put it all to the back of your mind for the coming weekend and try and enjoy the company of some good friends!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Our daughter will come in the morning to help

Our cleaner has just text, go away and relax, I'll be into sort things out
It will all be sorted when you return

You lot are there

Just how lucky am I 

Aldra


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Sandra *YOU* bring out the best in people, you are the special one that everyone is keen to be able to support......

Have a good weekend, but just remind Barry that Shadow does not take kindly to Albert being kissed, or you..... and that Shadow does get hungry 24/7.....

Dave

I genuinely wish we could be with you this weekend, but we will be thinking of you all and will look forward to seeing the pictures.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

do you all know

I will be OK

But do you all know just how important you all are??

Love all of you

sandra


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## organplayer (Jan 1, 2012)

*Organplayer*

Hi Aldra. I was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2007, successfully treated and had my last PSA check last November and discharged from the hospital. Obviously this must have been a terrible shock to you and yours having this diagnosis sprung on you, but this is very treatable as I can vouch. I wish you and yours every good wish.Eddie


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## Kaytutt (Feb 5, 2013)

Chin up Sandra, I wont tell you all will be well because I dont know that but I'll certainly be hoping for that for you both

Shove everything in the van and get off to the fruitcakes meet and give some of our mutual friends a hug from me cos I cant make it and I'm sure they'll give you a hug from me too.

Have a good time, live life to the full at every opportunity, never give up x
Kay


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## Tucano (Jun 9, 2006)

Looking forward to seeing you at the Fruitcakes, see you there.:-D


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## cabby (May 14, 2005)

chin up gal, wish I could join in with the fruitcakes, but too mean to pay the subscription. You have the strength and combined with all the love from us all on here to help you face anything.

cabby


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## ThePrisoner (Jan 13, 2009)

There is nothing I can really add to what everyone has said previously. 

Chin up lass, we are all here for you and Albert.


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## alexblack13 (Feb 10, 2013)

Aldra...

We have not met (I dont think) but let me help.

I was diagnosed with Prostate cancer Dec last year. Got on with it as best I could and I agree it is not easy. Docs and specialist nurses have been fantastic. They also told me (as above) most older guys can have it and many do indeed die WITH IT but NOT BECAUSE OF IT....

My own GP helped a lot too and told me about many of his other patients who have it and are doing really well. 

I got my treatment (hormone) started about 6 weeks ago (there is no need to rush as it does not go anywhere fast) and I have my 1st oncology appmnt on the 7th of May. The specialist then will tell me when I will be starting my radio therapy treatment which we have been told will be for either 4 weeks or 7 weeks. It will start approx 3 months after the hormone injections started... The jabs are every three months normally. So right now we wait till the 7th and then we are off and return when my second three monthly Injection is due. Then it will be 5 days a week for either the 4 or 7 weeks. We have been told by my fav' nurse it will most likely be 4. We hope this is so. Then we will be off again..

Right now I am symptom free and my PSA is almost normal. I have slight side effects from the jabs. Hot flushes for EG (remember those) and just a little tired at times and I have been thrown out of M&S Knicker dep't for trying on bra's that I fancied. That did make me cry!!

That is all that I have experienced apart from the UTI which started the whole episode. That was not fun and I also had a few days in Hospital after the biopsy when they gave me E Coli... I got out on Xmas eve and right now I am as normal!

Please pass our best wishes to your man & re assure him that he will be fine. Trust me.. He will.. 

Hugs and kisses from a complete stranger. Use these to cheer yourself up. Try not to worry. As also stated above it is far from being a death sentence nowadays. It is very treatable and often curable.
Alex....


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Alex, I wish you all the best with your treatment
You certainly had a rough start

We had the same problem last year when Albert was being treated for melanoma and ended up not going away

We decided to put any treatment on hold until we come back at the end of June, just hope that was a good decision. I don't think the consultant would have let us go if he felt the treatment could not be delayed

Luckily we have Christies, a fantastic Cancer facility and like you we will face it as best we can It hard sometimes not to let everything overwhelm you, at other times life goes on as normal 

Hope everything goes well with you, you are right, it is very curable these days. the lucky thing is to know you have it before it's too late to effect a cure. 

I like that scooter on your van :lol: 

Love and hugs to you too

sandra


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## alexblack13 (Feb 10, 2013)

Thanks Sandra.

Albert will get VERY good support from the Cancer UK specialist nurses (A charity I am now also supporting) to keep both of you upbeat and informed with as little worry as possible..You will get contact numbers to be able to call them with any concerns. They can tell you evrything that is going on and willhave fll access to Albert's case files. 

I am sure it will be fine. As you say early diagnosis does help a lot but there is still lots that can be done if need be... I was keen not to have the operation having been there and done that (Cardiac bypass).

Whilst on the subject... You guys out there of a certain age.... make sure you ask your Doc to check you out every 6 months. If you dont ask you wont get checked. Have a PSA blood test done and go back and check the results and get a digital rectum exam. 5 mins is all and totaly painless.. GET THIS DONE REGULARLY... Awareness talk over.. :wink: 

Keep us udated Sandra and talk to us. You are very far from alone.

We use the little Vespa a lot. It toured germany with us last year and was a little marvel... We enter it in shows where ever we go and sometime build trips around classic events... Great Bucks steam fair last year..We were with the MHF rally group. A great bunch of twits..

Just waiting on a new trailer to carry our classic Lotus Elan sports car around too....

Lots of Love..

Alex... (and Carol.. ''Mrs B'')


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## rosalan (Aug 24, 2009)

Lots of love and best wishes to you both.
....are you forgetting all of your nursing experience and that negative thoughts are totally unproductive?
I so wish that we were with you and your 'fruity friends but time is eating our life at the moment and we cannot be there. 

Rosalie and Alan


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## Mumoffive (Nov 22, 2013)

Sandra I'm sorry I've only just seen this. 
Take time to grieve. Grief is not only related to death. 
Allow yourself to be sad without feeling guilty. Then tuck it all back away in The archives to be unpacked again another time. 
Xxx


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## drcotts (Feb 23, 2006)

Hello Sandra
I read your post not because i am going through the same or anything like it but because i have been feeling down too of late but this is relationship stuff, and so wanted to say I know how you feel. People will often say with the best intentions that you should remain positive. and they are right but in most cases only you know what you are going through so just to say that we do all feel for you and hope you get through it all and come out the other side reasonably intact as far as can be anyways.

If things get really desperate you know where I and we all are.

Phill


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## HermanHymer (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Sandra
I've just seen this thread, and I'm sending you a big encouraging hug, to keep you going till I see you at Fruitcakes tomorrow. Cancer has a big fear factor, but at our age there are going to be many things that can "get you". But you cant worry about them all. When you've enjoyed your three score and ten, anything after that is a bonus and to be enjoyed to the full. You may remember, I've had cancer three times, last time already 10 years ago, but it was a blocked bowel that could have killed me in 2011.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the world is unfolding as it should!

I'm not the preachy kind but I like to share this thiught..."Let go and let God".


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## Kev1 (Apr 4, 2011)

Hi Sandra 
You don't know me .

Sometimes things just get to us. 
We feel we can't cope and can't function as we should.

A good cry and in my case i have an anvil i knock nine bells of s--t out of.

None of us can be superwoman or man all the time  
Sometimes knowing friends and family are rooting and the occasional stranger just eases things enough to get back onto a bit more of an even keel.

Chin up my love
Take your time a bit at a time in the right direction

Kev


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## teljoy (Jul 4, 2005)

aldra said:


> Feeling really down tonight
> 
> Had just managed to get my mind round melanoma
> 
> ...


Just want to let you know. We've never met but along with everyone else we just want you to know there's another family out here supporting you. You will get through this.

Terry and Joy


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## camallison (Jul 15, 2009)

Chin up Sandra - Fruitcakes meet should help. See you guys there on Saturday - I might not have a motorhome any more, but you can't keep me away from fruitcake! :lol: 

Colin (a survivor, if you remember)


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## nicholsong (May 26, 2009)

Sandra

I have not posted yet but I hope you are feeling better.

Can I offer you this thought - when you get to 'Fruitcakes' the mental problems may take precedence :lol: :lol: :lol: 

Joking apart you have my mental hugs and I hope the 'Fruitcakes Gang' will cheer you both up.

Love 

Geoff

P.S There is always a bit in the future - Just look forward to nicking and necking one of Barry's Leffe :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## 747 (Oct 2, 2009)

Howway man Sandra, we cannot have you feeling down. You are the one that keeps all of us going.

I am sure that it will work out OK for you both.

Best wishes.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Just what are you all like??

It's so important to be able to express anxiety safely 

I know I can on here

And I hope others will know the same

Family are great but sometimes you just need wider friends to advise and support

Haven't finished the van yet, but tomorrow we will, and off to the mad meet with the mad dog

Thank you, all of you for always being there

It's really very special

Sandra


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## Nethernut (Jun 4, 2008)

Glad we can help in any little way Sandra. My OH has just received the date for his op to remove a largish deep melanoma on his face for next week. So, hopefully, we will be set to go away for a couple of months from the middle of this month. 

Enjoy your trip.


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## alexblack13 (Feb 10, 2013)

Where is this mad meet? Has me fair intrigued.

All I know is it's 'up Norf'.. Scanned the posts but missed it I guess.

Can I be a fruitcake? Mrs B certainly thinks so? In fact she says I already am!!

..........................................---------.............................

Have a super time Sandra. If we get there I will bring a good bottle with us.

You take care and keep your chin (s? ..lol) up!!

xxxx... One (or more?) of these is for Albert.. You give him it though!!

Kind regards and the very best of wishes. Enjoy the weekend. :wink: 

Alex & Carol Black.


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Alex you sound like a perfect fruitcake

The meet is in Darlington 

Nice but obviously not in Lancashire

But we will pass over that quickly :lol: 

if you click on rally's all details are there

Me I'm not on fruitcakes , far too demure

Just secretly in love with that crazy lot

aldra


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## alexblack13 (Feb 10, 2013)

Ta Sandra I'll have a looksee.

Cheers me dear! :wink: 

Al' ... (to all my friends) You can call me Al' ...


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## MattHall (Nov 1, 2013)

Hi,
I'm new here but I like to say that I've had cancer in the family with both my parents and my father had prostate cancer treated with brachytherapy and is now very well.
But you have the right to be fed up and it's natural to feel low and don't bottle in up, but I was told by a consultant once that: it's not unlucky to be ill but you are lucky not to be.
Not to sound to dramatic but I have unfortunately lost family members at a young age so every day counts and getting out in the van can be a good way of making the most of it.
I can't help feeling how rubbish that last sentence sounds especially coming from myself whose not too great in enjoying every day but I hope you know it's meant with the best of intentions. 
best wishes
Matt


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Nethernut

I really know exactly how you feel 

The truth is they are making such advances in melanoma and plastic surgery 

Not that long ago it was just wait and see , there was no meaningful treatment

Now there is

Hang in there

Sending you both all our love and best wishes

Sandra and albert


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## simandme (Jan 11, 2011)

Hello

How are you feeling tonight? Hopefully a bit better - always good to get it off your chest - particularly at the beginining, so many unknowns! One thing for sure, we'll all be here to support you, so that you can do what you do best and support Albert!!

If you're still a bit down in the dumps, I'll get John, our pup, to give you a big cuddle - Shadow won't mind much will he?! 

Looking forward to meeting you all tomorrow...particularly the big pup 8)

Simone


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## Snunkie (Mar 21, 2011)

Sorry you're feeling so down Sandra. Try to keep going. The best medicine has to be keeping on in the MH surely x


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## patp (Apr 30, 2007)

It is ok to feel rubbish Sandra. Just keep on counting your blessings afterwards.
I do hope you have a lovely time and feel more positive for it.


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## thieawin (Jun 7, 2006)

Sandra, and Alex

Love, kisses, and fondles too, from the Isle of Man

Hope that isn't too familiar.

Enjoy your weekend 

John, Paul and our 4 mutts


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

thanks to all of you

You really are such a supportive lot

We are in France now and trying to just forget about it for a few weeks

The weather isn't to good but we are on the way down to the Dordogne,
At present in Chartres

Only just got the MIFI working

sandra


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## Phil42 (Apr 4, 2006)

Hi Sandra,

Only just caught up with this. So very sorry.

All the posts there have been so far show how many people on TP treasure you. You have helped so many others even those, like me, who you've never met.

There are some inspiring stories amongst the responses. Here's another which I may have posted about before.

At one of the dementia events I take my wife to we met a guy in his early eighties who looks after his wife who is nearly 80 herself and who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease over 10 years ago. He has prostate cancer. They visit San Diego several times a year to see family including twin granddaughters. He told me that they are planning to celebrate her birthday by flying to Hawaii.

This is the spirit shown by so many people on here and one that I know you share.

Your message, which comes through all the time, is that life is for living and it's so good that you got off on your latest adventure, even though there is this shadow over your lives.

Have a wonderful trip and here's hoping that in a few months you'll find that healthwise things look so much better.

Love to you and yours,

Phil


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Hi Sandrea.
Bit of luck you didn't call in last week as we were not here.!!! And the weather is crap.
But your always welcome on the return.

Hurggssss Ray.


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## suedew (May 10, 2005)

Hi Sandra and Albert, hope the weather picks up for you, spent a few days in Chartres on our way home last year, beautiful place.
not easy to put things to the back of your mind, but hope you have some peaceful moments. Was great seeing you again at fruitcakes missed having the mutt sit on my knee though :lol: 

Sue


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

ray, we would never turn up without arrangement

We may have a chance to drop in on the way back though as it would be lovely to see you both

We Have your phone no , need to be on the tunnel around the 20 th of June
sandra


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## Penquin (Oct 15, 2007)

Sandra, you would be very welcome to drop in here on your way back - hopefully it will be less hectic by then and the weather will have stabilized.

Dave


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

aldra said:


> ray, we would never turn up without arrangement
> 
> We may have a chance to drop in on the way back though as it would be lovely to see you both
> 
> ...


OK Sandra.
Early June is going to be a funny few weeks. As sisters are coming over for Prue's birthday and the 70th. D-Day landings.
Most inconsiderate as it stops me going to Le Mans yet again.!!!

Your always welcome and can fit in with the family.

Ray.


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