# Love Making Tips For Seniors



## MalanCris (Apr 2, 2007)

1. Wear your glasses. 
TO make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, 
In case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. 
(Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act..

8. Make all the noise you want... 
The neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news!!

10. Don't even think about trying it twice. .. . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . . . . . .. .

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs And make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes And you're barefoot.

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN.... 
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police .

'OLD' IS WHEN.. 
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take any fiber today.

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot.

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

AND

'OLD' IS WHEN... 
You are not sure if these are facts or jokes?

(I wrote this in large type 
so you can read it)


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## richardjames (Feb 1, 2006)

It' s ALL true :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## DTPCHEMICALS (Jul 24, 2006)

Ive got something to look forward to then :wink: 

Dave p


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## foll-de-roll (Oct 29, 2007)

Brilliant


Andy :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Briarose (Oct 9, 2007)

Whats Tylenol :?:


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## karenmac (Jan 26, 2008)

ALSO if you need contraception - take the the dog in the motorhome with you - ours ALWAYS sleeps between us! :lol:


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## CaGreg (Mar 28, 2007)

You know you're getting old when you start to like accordion music.

You know you're getting old when you love hearing about other people's operations.

You know you're getting old when a night out means sitting on the patio.

Ca


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## MalanCris (Apr 2, 2007)

Tylenol is a pain reliever and fever reducer that is available without a prescription - I had to look it up!! :lol:


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## iconnor (Nov 27, 2007)

You know you are getting old when everyone starts mumbling.


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

iconnor said:


> You know you are getting old when everyone starts mumbling.


What ! ! !


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## bigwhitebird (May 1, 2005)

Very Good and so right  :changes:


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