# The True Facts



## prof20 (Jan 11, 2007)

The True Facts.



Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Torch: a tube for holding dead batteries.

God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.

When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.



Roger


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## Glandwr (Jun 12, 2006)

You need to get yourself a hobby Roger  

Dick


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## Zebedee (Oct 3, 2007)

He already has one Dick.

This is it! :lol: :lol:

_P.S. Quite enjoyed these._


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## prof20 (Jan 11, 2007)

Glandwr said:


> You need to get yourself a hobby Roger
> 
> Dick


Yes - motorhoming - starting on Friday - leaving cyber box at home - taking Jack Daniels instead.

Can't win can I - videos criticized - jokes criticized.

Complied with diktat of Jokes Thread - It's a black hole.

Off to watch TV.

No controversial threads running, obviously, nothing to discuss.

I prefer jokes to politics. Thought I wouldn't alienate people by doing this. Wrong.

Regards, 
Roger


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

Zebedee said:


> He already has one Dick.
> 
> _P.S. Quite enjoyed these._


Do you know anyone with two :?: :?: :wink: :wink:


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## nicholsong (May 26, 2009)

Glandwr said:


> You need to get yourself a hobby Roger
> 
> Dick


Why would he want a 'Hobby' when he has a 'Hymer'? :lol:


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

I often say to my wife, "God gave you two ears and one mouth to enable you to listen twice as much as you talk". What happened?

Ray.


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## Kev1 (Apr 4, 2011)

lol


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## rayrecrok (Nov 21, 2008)

Hi.

Don't you think it is time to back off with the criticism and give him a break?..

He would be the first one to be hounded out of here for trying to make folk laugh or being inoffensive.. :roll: 

ray.


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## Kev1 (Apr 4, 2011)

Sorry Ray didn't follow that last comment!!!!!


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## rayrecrok (Nov 21, 2008)

Kev1 said:


> Sorry Ray didn't follow that last comment!!!!!


Hi.

If you don't follow it then you are OK :wink:

ray.


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

I think Rodger should be banned for life for posting so many interesting and sometimes very funny tales, photos, vids, & jokes. I think we can all do without all this jollity and just stick to the very interesting MH threads :roll:


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Thats a 'Fruitcake' comment Kev.

Ray.


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## colonel (Oct 11, 2008)

Did someone mention Fruit Cake? I'll have a large slice and a cuppa please!


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

raynipper said:


> Thats a 'Fruitcake' comment Kev.
> 
> Ray.


Of course it was Ray. :lol: :lol: I'm just getting a little fed up of members picking on other members just because they don't like something about them or what they do on site.


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## 747 (Oct 2, 2009)

I vote to keep the Prof and turf that Raynipper off.

Banish him to Fun, that'll teach him. :lol:


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Right, I'm off to try and drown my sorrows. Sadly I learnt to swim at an early age. Now even expert at getting out of sacks.

My wife has signed the 'pledge' this week but I keep filling up two glasses. It's tough but I'm coping.

Beginning to see Barry's point of venom now..... :twisted: 

Ray.


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