# What to do with your winter heating allowance



## bob-in-dav (Aug 11, 2013)

About this time of the year, older taxpayers will again be receiving another ' Winter Fuel’ payment once we've had a couple of weeks of decently cold weather. This is indeed a very exciting programme, and

I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

Q. What is a 'Winter Fuel’ payment ?
A. It is money that the government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money ?
A. >From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it and only if you're old enough.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase gas and electricity..or a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.K. Economy by spending your ' Winter Fuel’ cheque wisely:

* If you spend the money at Asda or Tesco, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka

* If you spend it on petrol your money will go to the Arabs

* If you purchase a computer it will go to India, Taiwan or China

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras andGuatemala

* If you buy an efficient car it will go to Japan or Korea

* If you purchase useless stuff it will go to Taiwan

* If you pay off your credit cards or buy shares, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. 


Instead, keep the money in the UK by:


1. Spending it at car boot sales

2. Going to night clubs

3. Spending it on prostitutes

4. Buying beer or whisky

5. Getting yourself a Tattoo

6. Visiting a bookie


(These are the only UK businesses still operating in the U.K. )


Conclusion: Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a car boot sale and drink beer day and night!

No need to thank me...just glad I could be of help.


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## pippin (Nov 15, 2007)

The sad thing is that if you actually DO spend it on extra heating the odds are that the *foreign-owned* electricity/gas company will reap the benefit :x


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## alhod (Nov 1, 2010)

Mildly amusing but factually flawed!

We give ours to Shelter and would recommend similar to anyone who does not actually need it to pay heating bills (which is likely most on here).

Alan


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

I spend it on Heating, I know, silly of me, but then the money I saved I spend on Christmas pressies.

I think it is wrong not to spend it on heating, as it might be removed if HM gov found out it was being wasted, and we don't all have deep pockets do we.


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## Nethernut (Jun 4, 2008)

We too given us to charity, in our case Help 4 homeless veterans. i am fully aware that for many people the money does help but the help would be much better used to give them an overall good standard of living rather than spending the end of their lives struggling to live!


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## pippin (Nov 15, 2007)

On the same theme - what do you spend that extra tenner on that you get with your State Pension every Christmas?


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## Pudsey_Bear (Sep 25, 2008)

pippin said:


> On the same theme - what do you spend that extra tenner on that you get with your State Pension every Christmas?


I could make a suggestion for that. if you don't need it, Send the bugger to me, failing that, how about spending some of it on a envelope, and a second class stamp (can't go spending willie nillie can we) write a cheque for the balance and send it back to them telling them they could do better, tight fisted arseholes.


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## nicholsong (May 26, 2009)

I assumed it was for the LPG :lol:


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## greygit (Apr 15, 2007)

We give ours to charity as well.


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## powerplus (Oct 6, 2014)

just missed the allowance this year
but looking forward to spending it on propane and possibly hookup for the van next winter

barry


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

I don't know

It goes into the general pot

But I giveto charity

Maybe it's where it's where it goes

But I know I've paid everything that has been asked of me

It's how it is

Aldra


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## dalspa (Jul 1, 2008)

Make a pile of the notes, get the family to huddle around and then light the pile. You will feel the heat given off and NOBODY else will benefit. Simples  

DavidL


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## rosalan (Aug 24, 2009)

We cashed it and put the notes into a Christmas card for our two daughters as an extra Christmas present this year.

Alan


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## StAubyns (Jun 4, 2006)

2 cubic metres of oak for the wood burner from Welbeck Estates. That leaves £50 for charity.

regards

Geoff


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## pippin (Nov 15, 2007)

"2 cubic metres of oak for the wood burner"

Blimey your wood burner must have a bl00dy big door on the front to get a lump of wood that size into it!


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## aldra (Jul 2, 2009)

Well thinking about this post

I've put in on our daughters electric card

At least now she has not to worry about elec so she can use the savings for gas

Will she?

No chance, money disappears

Both her and her son are as bad
But the elec will still be there for a while :lol: :lol: 

Every little helps :lol: 8O 

Aldra


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