# Banned From the Co-op



## mauramac (May 24, 2005)

*Banned from the co-op - Didn't like shopping there anyway *

Yesterday I was at my local CO-OP buying a large bag of Purina dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? 
So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that
no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. 
I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in hospital last time, but that I'd lost 2 stones before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.

(I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. 
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

I'm now banned from the Co-op.

Better watch what you ask retired people.

They have all the time in the world to think of daft things to say :lol:


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## dawnwynne (Nov 14, 2009)

:lol: :lol: I will never question anyone in a queue again! :lol:


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## Manchego (Sep 26, 2009)

Very good, i like that one.


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## newbob (Jan 29, 2010)

mauramac said:


> *Banned from the co-op - Didn't like shopping there anyway *
> 
> Yesterday I was at my local CO-OP buying a large bag of Purina dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
> 
> ...


 :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Codfinger (Jan 11, 2008)

*co op*

Love your sense of humor ............. :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Codfinger (Jan 11, 2008)

*co op*

I think a lot of peeps missed this post


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## karlb (Feb 22, 2009)

:lol:


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## Fleurette (Feb 5, 2010)

*co-op*

I wish I'd been in that queue, thanks for making me laugh :lol: :lol:

Theresa and Sophie


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## Fleurette (Feb 5, 2010)

*co-op*

I wish I'd been in that queue, thanks for making me laugh :lol: :lol:

Theresa and Sophie


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## anneandgeorge (May 1, 2005)

Brilliant. I wish I'd been in the queue too. Haven't laughed so much for ages :lol: :lol: :lol: Great. Anne


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## DTPCHEMICALS (Jul 24, 2006)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: 
Try it with Go Cat

This is better than politics.

dave p


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## gofer (Feb 8, 2010)

*coop*

still drying my eyes better than watching telly


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## hblewett (Jan 28, 2008)

NIce one :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## jasonb (Feb 27, 2009)

Brilliant! Can't wait to retire

Ed


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## mauramac (May 24, 2005)

It's good to have a larf..... :lol: 
So pleased you all liked it.


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