# hmmmm so why did we buy a motorhome??



## Tezmcd (Aug 3, 2009)

Having spent a few weekends away camping in a tent, shivering in the cold, looking at the surrounding motorhomers all tucked up warmly in their vans we decided "we want some of that life"!

Now we have taken the plunge suddenly my wife comes up with a few rules!

1. We cant actually use the toilet - we must use the site facilities unless its a middle of the night emergency - MUST KEEP THE NEW MH PRISTINE!

2. We mustn't use the shower - we must use the site facilities - MUST KEEP THE NEW MH PRISTINE!

3. We will put crappy offcut carpet over the nice removable carpets -MUST KEEP THE NEW MH PRISTINE!

4. We mustn't fart in the MH - must go outside at 4am to do such things - MUST KEEP THE NEW MH PRISTINE!

5. We mustn't actually drive the MH anywhere - must keep low mileage - MUST KEEP THE NEW MH PRISTINE!

I could go on and on but I think you get the idea.......

My options are 

1. Get a new wife

2. Wife gets MH - I use a tent

Ahhhhhh well - I'm looking forward to it all - and congratulations to the people who buy our MH when we sell it - you lucky buggers I hope you poo in it, fart in it, drink in it, rub your dirty feet in it, wash in it, shower in it etc etc 

LOL


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## RichardnGill (Aug 31, 2006)

Dont worry it normal, most of the rules will get relaxed a bit after the newness has gone in a few months, 

Been there and done it twice.


Richard...


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## bognormike (May 10, 2005)

:lol: :lol: maybe some compromise is needed - you can go outside before 4am - as long as you do it quietly 8)


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## sideways (Jun 2, 2008)

sounds to me like you need to tell her whose in charge, are you a man or a mouse, come on squeak up.


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## firewood (Mar 17, 2009)

go on use it that why you bought it
ours is only 9 months old and has 10.000 miles on it already we use it every w/end and will use it all winter as well .
start useing it and enjoy it.


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## raynipper (Aug 4, 2008)

Hi Tezmcd,
Yep I think I might have ended up there but for a short sharp battle where we drew the lines. 
Camper my domain. Everywhere else her domain. I got less to clean.

Ray.


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## Tezmcd (Aug 3, 2009)

Well come 4am I think I'm gonna get up - go for a poo, then take a shower, do a couple of gas expulsions and brush my teeth to boot - I bet sleeping beauty doesnt even roll over and complain - and in the morning she will never know................shhhh it will be our secret!


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## rraf (Jul 11, 2009)

sideways said:


> sounds to me like you need to tell her whose in charge, are you a man or a mouse, come on squeak up.


 :lol: :lol: :lol:

It's like when we get a new car,my OH says must keep it clean bla bla bla,but after 2 weeks no-one could give a toss.It's only a THING...not a human!If something gets broken...it can be replaced...(see my post about my MH probs....that'll give you a larf! :lol:  )


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## lufc (Jun 24, 2007)

Play the waiting game, some early morning/late night when its raining and cold outside she will take the easy option and use the on board facilities. Once that happens the throne will be yours


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## buellster (Feb 3, 2008)

Ply her with red wine, until she's sick in the vans toilet. All rules gone simples!


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## teemyob (Nov 22, 2005)

*Pristine*

I take it you won't be needing corner steadies then! 8)


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## Stanner (Aug 17, 2006)

*Re: Pristine*



teemyob said:


> I take it you won't be needing corner steadies then! 8)


 :lol: :lol: :lol: :roll:


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## iandsm (May 18, 2007)

*motorhome*

So are you one of the sad looking people I regularly see in the peeing rain and wind carrying a washbag over a wet field each morning as I look out of my heated shower enclosure having just enjoyed a scrub up. You probably look sad since you paid all that money for something you can't use. Don't kid yourself you will get a better trade in price and even if you did get maybe £500 quid, would that compensate for what you could have enjoyed.


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## teemyob (Nov 22, 2005)

*Re: motorhome*



iandsm said:


> So are you one of the sad looking people I regularly see in the peeing rain and wind carrying a washbag over a wet field each morning as I look out of my heated shower enclosure having just enjoyed a scrub up. You probably look sad since you paid all that money for something you can't use. Don't kid yourself you will get a better trade in price and even if you did get maybe £500 quid, would that compensate for what you could have enjoyed.


Yes, I have to agree with all of the above. Worked hard to buy it so will enjoy it whilst keeping it clean.

Trev


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## littlenell (Aug 1, 2008)

As, I am guessing here, it will be you on toilet emptying duties, bloomin' well enjoy the christening of said toilet.


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## gromett (May 9, 2005)

Depreciation of £1,000's will occur whether you use it or not. You may keep 1 or 2 hundred in value. Use the van as it was designed and enjoy the £1,000's you are undoubtedly going to lose anyway 

Karl


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## erneboy (Feb 8, 2007)

I do not think you can preserve the value by not using it. I have traded four times and no dealer has even looked inside, fart away.

Nice one teemyob, Alan.


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## Rislar (Aug 16, 2008)

Funny thread i agree, get it used as it should be


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## marnaz (Jun 24, 2009)

Well thats why we bought our RV with some years on it 2002. but we dont worry to much when were pushed into the roadside hedges by on coming traffic, were not afraid to use it and enjoy it. the only time extra carpet comes out is when its muddy or raining.

Motto..... Life is not for ever, use your home and enjoy....


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## Pusser (May 9, 2005)

Our m\home is two berth only. It can seat several in U lounge but of course we cannot carry several.

Missus insists on taking what she wants for the kitchen. Thus we have a complete dinner service for six with the odd extra plate, mug, knife and fork, bowl in case of breakages. We have several wine glasses, drinking glasses, shot glasses although neither of us have ever had one, and a beer glass. We have mixing bowls colander, gas toaster, electric toaster and enough teaspoons to hold a car boot sale.

We have 4 or 5 kitchen preparation knives, two or three bottle openers, two or three corks screws although only the missus has the odd wine. We have a set of slot into each other pans, 3 frying pans, approx 4 saucepans, and we carry spare food in case of a nuclear incident. i.e. sardines, baked beans, water, 100's of Tea bags and assorted quadruplet cleaning sprays, bottles and scourers, dishcloths. For the two of us we have a choice of bedding. My duvalays which she will not use but I do. Two single quilts if we use the single beds, a double quilt in cas we use the whole of the U lounge and 8 pillows. Plus underneath sheets, top sheets, blankets and always the hot water bottle. We have two kettles.

It is my belief that the new owner of Porky is quite likely to double his mpg figures overnight.


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## greenasthegrass (Oct 27, 2007)

These things are meant to be used. Our shower had hardly been used if at all and it took ages to get the Truma to stop that "new" smell we thought it was faulty and had it back to Lowdhams. So it does the vans no favours not using the stuff inside.

It's like mileage on the clock they are commercial vehicles (bases) and should be used or else they seize up.

Hence we have put 5,000 miles on since February and enjoyed every blooming one of em!

Greenie :lol:


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## teemyob (Nov 22, 2005)

*Van*

I think the consensus is that your good Lady has the wrong idea.

Time for Change

Trev


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## Jezport (Jun 19, 2008)

I would go out have 6pints of Guiness, take a vindaloo takeaway back to eat in the van. Then sit in the van and wait for nature to take its course while eating a tin of baked beans.


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## marnaz (Jun 24, 2009)

Hi
Ok we have all had our say, and feel for your situation. But I really feel you have some domestic issuses with your wife, or as you say 'The Missus'
Dose she approve of you 'having a go' on the forum? Sounds like she is proud, and rightly so of her new home. As mentioned before it dose ware off, after a few times away. but honestly as another wrote to me you like to be 'steam rollered' with these things she wants to bring with her. You must be a mouse or something. !!!!

I for one love my wife to bits and would not dream of dragging these issues up on a public forum.
Guess ill get flamed now for saying this, but forums are for expressing how you feel.
getting off my soap box now.

Marnaz


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## Pusser (May 9, 2005)

marnaz said:


> I for one love my wife to bits and would not dream of dragging these issues up on a public forum.
> Guess ill get flamed now for saying this, but forums are for expressing how you feel.
> getting off my soap box now.
> 
> Marnaz


I see the point but I think most of this is always tongue in cheek and certainly my references always are with missus\wifey etc. I am not sure that this explanation would actually satisfy her if she read some of the things I have written but then again, nor would she be surprised. But I hope I am equally degrading about myself so I think that evens things up a bit.


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## rraf (Jul 11, 2009)

Come on Marnaz...we're not taking this too seriously..just playing...come on..join in....Tig- you're it" :lol:


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## Phillip (Jul 20, 2009)

This thread is the funniest thing I've read in a long time  

Especially about the lack of need for corner steadies - that made me laugh out loud (not good in an office full of people when I'm supposed to be working :roll: )

Brilliant though. Our MH is 13 years old and we (myself and the kids) still get some of this 8O 

Marnaz, take your head for a dump. This is all tongue in cheek stuff and taken exactly in the way it is meant to be.

I'm going back to chuckling to myself now - see ya :lol:


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## barryd (May 9, 2008)

Simple answer to this one.

Take her to Europe, France, ITaly whatever and tell her there are no campsites (once you get off the ferry).

Take advantage of the thousands of fantastic wild camping spots where you can camp perfectly legal for free or use some of the many Aires set aside just for your motorhome and often free or cheap as chips and then see how long she lasts without using the loo or shower!

If shes an accountant like Mrs D is she will soon be delighted when she realises that your two weeks/months/years camping abroad have cost you next to nothing in camping fees!

Mrs D keeps our 13 year old Kontiki spotless but she also likes to keep herself spotless and as we dont use campsites the shower gets used a lot. I eat curry and drink beer a lot, guess what my main job is!


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## marnaz (Jun 24, 2009)

[/quote]

I am not sure that this explanation would actually satisfy her if she read some of the things I have written but then again, nor would she be surprised. But I hope I am equally degrading about myself so I think that evens things up a bit. [/quote]

Ahh well I told you!!!!! looks like youl be fighting over the doble bed, at least you will have many options for places to sleep.....
Marnaz


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## Tezmcd (Aug 3, 2009)

Just FYI the original post was indeed very much tongue in cheek!

My wife can be a little little bit like that, but on the otherhand she does know that I totally ignore all her wishes whatever they are. And she realises that if she tells me not to fart I will go out of my way to do quite the opposite! 

I have enjoyed reading the replies though - very amusing


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## marnaz (Jun 24, 2009)

Hey dont worry (im sure your not) I do understand tongue in cheek...
Just didnt want to see a 'domestic' happen to you before the camping season was out. As for farting in bed... my wife would superglue up my sleeping bags zipper so ide perish in my own gas...
martin


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## locovan (Oct 17, 2007)

I have really enjoyed all the comments on here BUT--Really this is a sad topic---you have paid out hard earned cash to buy your second home so go out and enjoy it and life.
Travel and camp and relax in your own shower and your own toilet and use your own cooker.
It is your home stop worrying about what you will loose in moneyand look at what you will gain in fun.
I love cleaning it and getting it ready for the next outing I hope your wife will relax and enjoy herself and you can --erm--pass wind at 3am :roll: .


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## bigbazza (Mar 6, 2008)

Now now Mavis, nice ladies don't talk about those things


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## locovan (Oct 17, 2007)

bigbazza said:


> Now now Mavis, nice ladies don't talk about those things


want a bet :wink:


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## CaGreg (Mar 28, 2007)

Way to go Mavis! Yes, enjoy all aspects of the van, if the woman wants a MH to keep clean buy her a little model of one to put on the matlepiece and dust every day! 

The best times we have had in the MH were when we did things that messed it up, like coming in from the sea after a bodyboarding session, and dripping sea water all over it, but oh! the joy of a warm van after the cold Atlantic.
Or entertaining family or friends and feeding them all from the tiny kitchen, children with sand on their feet, or food on their hands, hey what about it? 
The alternative is sitting at home, dreaming about being in a MH. 

We have stains on the carpets, a bit of rust starting, a stain from leaving the window open on a wet day, but more importantly we have memories that put huge smiles on our faces and a sense of urgency about the next trip away.

Hopefully she will get over it after a while and will relax into the wonderful, carefree life that is MHing.

Ca


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## firewood (Mar 17, 2009)

if so meny people like claning m/homes so much could you pop round on mondays and clean mine 
thanks


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## daps (Apr 23, 2009)

firewood said:


> if so meny people like claning m/homes so much could you pop round on mondays and clean mine
> thanks


.
.
And mine, only I'm not as fussy on what day you come.!!


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## daps (Apr 23, 2009)

firewood said:


> if so meny people like claning m/homes so much could you pop round on mondays and clean mine
> thanks


.
.
deleted duplicated for some reason.


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## marnaz (Jun 24, 2009)

I'll even drive you back home !!!


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## firewood (Mar 17, 2009)

i was frist .
and if monday is no good you could do it sunday night
thanks


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## locovan (Oct 17, 2007)

Hmmmseems to me thee is business idea coming here.

Motorhome.cleaninside.com :lol: :lol:


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## firewood (Mar 17, 2009)

locovan said:


> Hmmmseems to me thee is business idea coming here.
> 
> Motorhome.cleaninside.com :lol: :lol:


no i didnt say i was going to pay .i thought i was helping by letting someone clean my m/home


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## daps (Apr 23, 2009)

locovan said:


> Motorhome.cleaninside.com :lol: :lol:


.
I was thinking of motorhome.cleanoutside.com.
The inside is a doddle as I've only got a little one!! 8O


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## Alfa_Scud (Sep 27, 2006)

daps said:


> The inside is a doddle as I've only got a little one!! 8O


Ah, poor you, but what's that got to with cleaning? I suppose it won't get in the way   8O

Put me on the list for free cleaning too please, either inside or outside, not fussy really although I have just cleaned the outside myself. I don't want any shoddy quick once overs though - it has to be a thorough job. I like to see someone who takes pride in providing a free service!!

Let the offers roll in - I'll provide free directions to my house if required, although I may have to make a small charge if you use my cleaning stuff


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## bonnieboo (Apr 27, 2009)

Tezmcd said:


> Just FYI the original post was indeed very much tongue in cheek!
> 
> My wife can be a little little bit like that, but on the otherhand she does know that I totally ignore all her wishes whatever they are. And she realises that if she tells me not to fart I will go out of my way to do quite the opposite!
> 
> I have enjoyed reading the replies though - very amusing


You and my husband must be related. 8O


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