# best one liners at the Edinburgh fringe



## bognormike (May 10, 2005)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-11053202

I liked number 5 :lol:


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## DTPCHEMICALS (Jul 24, 2006)

The top 10 festival funnies were judged to be:

1) Tim Vine "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again."

2) David Gibson "I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone."

3) Emo Philips "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them."

4) Jack Whitehall "I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid."

5) Gary Delaney "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog."

6) John Bishop "Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day."

Continue reading the main story 
“
Start Quote
I'm going to celebrate by going to Sooty's barbecue and having a sweepsteak”
End Quote 
Tim Vine
7) Bo Burnham "What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names."

8) Gary Delaney "Dave drowned. So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it's what he would have wanted."

9) Robert White "For Vanessa Feltz, life is like a box of chocolates: Empty."

10) Gareth Richards "Wooden spoons are great. You can either use them to prepare food. Or, if you can't be bothered with that, just write a number on one and walk into a pub…"


Dave p


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## jimmyd0g (Oct 22, 2009)

Number 8 does it for me.


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## ChrisandJohn (Feb 3, 2008)

Yep, No. 5 and No. 8 :lol: 


Chris


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## Rosbotham (May 4, 2008)

Definitely the Tim Vine ones...it's not just the quality but quantity. His act is a whirlwind of one-liners. The bizarre thing being when you walk away, there were so many you can't remember any of them...audio only, but try this.


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## Grizzly (May 9, 2005)

Rosbotham said:


> Definitely the Tim Vine .


Me too. He is such a clever man. He does the English language proud.

G


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## JustRadio (May 21, 2005)

Nah, gotta be 3

You're Motorhomers

Right?

John
Motorhome Radio - just find the radio player on the home page left navigation, click the dropdown and choose us!


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## neilbes (Oct 16, 2006)

Funny, none of my jokes made it in the top 10. :roll:


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## motormouth (Jul 3, 2010)

Is it just me, 'cos I don't think any are side splittingly funny. Not enough to win or appear in "best of" awards.

Give me Tommy Cooper, Morecambe and Wise, Ken Dodd, Bob Monkhouse or Frank Carson any day. Yes I know most are gone, more's the pity.

There are some funny guys around today, but I can't think of their names of the top of my head. Oh, just remembered Peter Kay, now he's funny.

All IMO  :lol:


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