# Clement Freud



## geraldandannie (Jun 4, 2006)

I've just been watching a programme about Clement Freud - a great antidote to the downbeat stuff happening around us. At the end of the programme, he told this joke:


There was a man whose wife told him: "If you come back home drunk just once more, I'm going to leave you."

He went down the pub, and drank an awful lot. So much, in fact, that he was sick down his front.

"What am I going to tell my wife now?" he asked his friend.

His friend gave him a £20 note, and said: "When she asks, just say someone was sick down your front, and that he gave you £20 for the cleaning bill."

So he goes home, and his wife goes mad. But he says: "No, no, a man was sick down my front, and he gave me £20 for the cleaning bill."

His wife says: "But you have two £20 notes in your hand."

The man says: "The other one is from the man who shat in my pants."


Well, it made me laugh anyway.

Gerald


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## ThursdaysChild (Aug 2, 2008)

That's upbeat, is it ?


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## geraldandannie (Jun 4, 2006)

ThursdaysChild said:


> That's upbeat, is it ?


Dunno. I found it funny. It made me laugh. I thought it might make someone else laugh.

Gerald


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## joedenise (Jul 20, 2007)

Hi Gerald

I thought it was funny    

joe


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## ChrisandJohn (Feb 3, 2008)

I saw it too. He also talked about getting old and said 'When a woman asks him to go upstairs and make love to her he has to say 'I'm sorry, at my age it's one or the other'.   


Chris


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## Zebedee (Oct 3, 2007)

I laughed as well Gerald.  

Cried when I read Chris' post though.

Too near the truth to be funny.   

Dave


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## geraldandannie (Jun 4, 2006)

ChrisandJohn said:


> 'When a woman asks him to go upstairs and make love to her he has to say 'I'm sorry, at my age it's one or the other'.


 :lol: :lol: There were so many brilliant, deadpan deliveries during the programme. A great wit, and sadly missed.

Gerald


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## daddysgirl (May 31, 2008)

:lol: :lol: :lol:


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## karlb (Feb 22, 2009)

:lol: :lol:


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